The Spiritual Arts Academy
by onegrainofuniverse
Summary: Tamako Kei dreamed of one thing only: To be capable to defend those in need. When the 3th seat of squad 6 dies his younger sister loses a part of her world. At the funeral she gets back on her feets with wise words from no one other then the Captain of squad 6. She takes on her brothers dream but becoming a Death God isn't easy. First, Tamako Ayame must take the entrance exam.
1. Chapter 1

_**Chapter 1**_

 _I remember when I first saw him. It was in the late spring five years ago and the sakura blossom had just started to bloom..._

 **FIVE YEARS AGO**

The evening strolled around the corner with a orange and pink sky. The wind stroked against my skin and the sun kissed my cheeks with a peculiar warmth. I looked over the landscape of Sieritei. All buildings looked so small from the cliff outside the city. Even the Gotei 13 headquarters looked small. It was beautiful and in a season that only showed the beauty of nature I was supposed to feel joy. I had the most spectacular view before me and I felt... empty. The truth was that I felt so alone looking over the Soul Society. I even stood in a crowd there hundreds of strangers laid their hand on my shoulder and said their prayers and regards of my brothers death. I couldn't hear them. I had shut my ears and only nodded to them saying the same phrase over and over.

"Thank you for coming, I know that Kei would have appreciated it." Kei was kindhearted to the core of his heart. He had never broken a promise, said anything mean behind someones back or blamed anyone for his doing. Kei only praised others and showed that he cared. He always asked how they were doing and if someone asked him to do anything he never said no. He gave his soul to others and had no doubt. I was so proud to be his younger sister. I followed his footsteps but when he jumped and took the entrance exams to become a Death God I couldn't go after him. He said he did it to be able to protect me but to me he left me with no defenses. Little by little I lost my world and my path in life. Kei joined one of the divisions in Gotei 13 and even got a seated position as an officer. I lost his attention and he followed his dream... to be able to protect everyone... but he couldn't do anything about his will to sacrifice himself for others. That was why I stood there today.

I didn't know how long I was in my thoughts but when a pressure came I snapped out of it. I had never felt anything like it before. It was like weights pushed me down to the ground. First did I think that it was my sorrow that made my knees bend but when I saw him I understood. I was force-sensitive but even if I wouldn't be my body would have reacted the same way. His gaze was breathtaking. A pair of dark blue eyes with a shade of grey looked at me. His raven black hair fell perfect when he moved and gently touched his muscular shoulders. His cape got capture by the breeze. I knew that cape. I had never seen one in real life but I had heard of it. Kei had mentioned it once. A Death God with a white haori – a symbol with a number on the back and a pattern at the end – was a Captain. His haori had a high collar with golden edges and on the sides light golden tassels. It was more then his good looks. It was his spiritual pressure. I tried to breath but the air became thick and my organs were about to explode. How could a reiatsu be that strong? He didn't even show it on purpose.

"That's the Captain of squad 6. What is he doing here?" The crowd started to mumble and I had to look down in the grass. I couldn't even look at him longer then a few seconds. My eyes failed me so I started depending on my hearing. I shouldn't have done that. Gossip. Rumors.  
"I heard that during the mission where the 3th seat of squad 6, Kei-san, lost his life he sacrificed himself to save dozens of members of squad 6. Instead of a great number of deaths there was only one. It would been rude not coming." The Captain was probably used to hear whispers about him but it sounded like he didn't even got effected. His steps came closer and closer.

"Kei-san wasn't only a hero but also a dear friend to the Captain, believe it or not. It may sound strange when looking at how cold he is, that noble. Kei-san was able to open his souls heart. They were like best friends. Only his wife were able to do that before but... it seems that if you are capable to do that you will die quite young." He walked towards me and then stopped, standing less then 5 feet away from me.

"Your spiritual energy is out of control. Try to calm down and it will stop." I didn't even know this Captain of squad 6 but something told me that he wasn't the one to speak to strangers. He wasn't the one to leave a broken soul in pieces either. He wanted to help.  
"Focus." I took a deep breath and slowly tried to stand up again. He looked over me closely and when I finally got calm, I could breathe again. As soon I were up on me feets I tried to get eye contact but that wasn't possible. He was like ice – showed no emotions.  
"Thank you..." I had to say something in return. He didn't show any trace of a smile. He just nodded but even that movement were well hidden.

"You look a lot like Kei." It was true. I had my similarites with Kei. The same dark blonde hair that in the sun got a golden tint and big round eyes that reminded of the stone called 'Tiger's eye'. Now, however, wasn't the time I wanted to look like Kei. It was like blades pierce through my chest. I didn't want to hear that. I didn't want him to see Kei when he probably were the one who gave Kei his last mission. He said Keis name without saying -chan or -san after. Did he reconsider my brother as an important friend? Or was he just glad that one soul sacrificed himself for the sake of his men? I closed my eyes. I didn't know anything about my brothers life. All I knew was that I loved him.  
"They say..." He didn't let me finish my statement.

"I envy you. That makes you able to see him everyday." Surprised by his answer, I understood. He said exactly what I needed to hear. He knew that I lost my brother but having something that reminded me of him made it bearable.  
"You brother was a comrade you could count on and had great potential to become a Captain. With your reiatsu you should consider joining the Shin'ō Academy too." I lost my words. I wanted to blame him a bit for my brothers death but... he just gave me a steppingstone to go back to Keis footsteps.

"How could I join something that killed my brother?" This Captain didn't like to have explain his actions. It was like he wanted to talk in riddles to make the beholder figure out them main reason.

"Kei always said that his ability to protect others was his pride. You look like you lost your pride so perhaps you can maintain his." His words stroked my heart in a flash. He didn't suggest that I would become Kei. He didn't say that I had to keep up his work. He only said that if I was lost - my brother could show me a way to live on. I couldn't help but smile a bit. Kei always talked about miracles and destiny. He would have wanted me to help others and now when he couldn't do that... Maybe this was my destiny. I felt how something inside me become brighter.

"What's your name, Captain...?" I needed to know the name of the person that opened my eyes. For years I had only believed in Keis strength. I had only wanted him to show me attention... I had never given any attention to anyone else. I was alone because I made myself alone. I realized that now.

Everyone listened to our conversation. I could hear some gasp for air, as if I had said something that I shouldn't. I felt creeps agains my spine. Was it that bad not knowing the name of a Captain? "The sister of Tamako Kei doesn't know the name of his Captain? That's rude." The Captain looked at me now. He saw that I changed inside by his words. He didn't smile but he seemed nicer after noticing it.

"I'm Kuchiki Byakuya." By his appearance I knew that he wouldn't ask for my name. He was to serene and apathetic. I took the opportunity in my own hands.

"I'm Tamako Ayame."


	2. Chapter 2

_**Chapter 2**_

I learned much after that day, five year ago. I learned that it was hard to live on your own and sometimes you had to ask for help. It wasn't something that made you weak. It was something that made you strong. I started to count and believe in others and to my surprise, others started to do the same towards me. I wasn't used to it but with kindhearted friends... all it took was time and right now - I had all the time in the world.

The first year passed fast and when I encounter one of the persons that were on Kei's funeral - it all started. Easier said it felt like I started a new life. His name was Konno Daisuke and he gave me a chance of a lifetime. A chance to prepare to become a Death God. I hadn't thought about it during the funeral but all the guests had wished for my wellbeing and everyone of them were specialized in a different subject. Konno Daisuke were an owner of the biggest library in Soul Society.

There, I started study the Soul Socitys laws, traditions and different techniques the Death Gods fought in. I had listened to the Captain of squad 6 but... I needed to be mental prepared. I needed to become an independent and trustworth person before I could maintain Kei's honor. Konno Misaki helped me with that. Together helped the Konno family me even more. He opened up his armes and invited me like I was important. I had never felt special but... he gave me emotionals. She was the daughter of Konno Daisuke and were also preparing for the exam. She gave me something to look forward to. She gave me my first friend. Normally, you didn't need to prepare to the exams but.. I didn't want to come to the tests with no knowledge at all. Misaki was thinking exactly like me. One day, Konno Daisuke came in with a guest to the library with same dream as ours. His name was Shiro Ryuu. He had been working part-time at a restaurant and then the restaurant went bankrupt. He didn't get access to food and he fainted. Konno Daisuke was a savior. As well as he saved me, he saved another child. We became a team. We all started to study together. Without knowing it... So many things happened in just five years.

 **TODAY**

The sun stood high upon the sky and I hated it. It had been over 40°c for a month now and if this didn't stop soon, many spiritual sensitive children would die. Children that weren't discovered yet. Children that were the future of Sieritei. The sun had dried out the ground and cracks were all over the streets. The force sensitive weren't the only ones that had it rough.. everyone had a hard time. The price at the market rise at almost impossible numbers and I had helped at least one old man with his trailer made of wood everyday because it got stuck in a crack. Nothing grew. This weather didn't help anyone. I had given all the food and water I had in my bag, the black one that Misaki gave me for my birthday one year ago, to a group of children trying to steal. It was my breakfast and my lunch but... I couldn't stand the thought losing anyone if I could make a difference. I guessed Kei would have done that. Maybe Kei would been proud of me. If he was proud, I could be proud too. I needed to be proud. This was an important day and without food all that had me going was my stubborness.

I knew Misaki would be angry with me, giving up my food, but I also knew that she would understand. Ryuu would be mad. I could hear his voice in my head but I couldn't help but smile about it. That voice that always blamed everything and everyone but himself.

"Wasting food on others? You have to survive too, you know, If not give it to me."

We decided yesterday that we would met up at the eastern gate to the Gotei 13 headquarters. I walked along the streets and looked upon the gate. It was so big. I had to look up to see the end of the wall but that didn't work when the suns sunlight hit my eyes. This white wall... this white wall divided people and now I could become a part of it. A part of the side that didn't have to worry about food. A part that helped others. A part of me felt that everyone should have the chance... but the world didn't work that way.

I had never been this close to the wall. I had never really have had a reason to. Never as in the past five years. I liked to come here before, when Kei was alive. I felt that we were closer to each other. I felt his presences. Inside the walls were Gotei 13 headquarters. There, somewhere inside one of the buildings, I would take the test that could change my life. Create my future. I couldn't believe it. I stopped for a while and took a deep breath. I put my blonde hair in hair knot at the back of my head. It was the same hairstyle I had every time I studied with my friends. My fighting look. Some strands of hair always left the knot and I had to put them behind my ears.

"Ayame-chan!" It was Misakis voice. The voice of an angel. Light and hided a melody behind it. Before me stood Konno Daisuke, Misaki and Shiro Ryuu. Konno Daisuke was a man in middle-age but was a man that looked even older. Older as in wiser. His ice blue eyes told that he had seen a lot and learned both by reading and by experienced it. The wide scar on his jaw told that he had been a fighter and had never given up. He denied age. He had dark brown hair but with the years they had turned grey. He tried to hide it under a white bandana but it didn't really match the blue and grey kimono he was wearing. He held his hand on his hips. Looking serious. Misaki waved at me. She was short so, she always put her hand up to the air. She said that made her longer... but I didn't say anything about that. As long as she smiled with her bright smile, I could rest safe. Her hair was tied in an advance light brown braid. She wasn't much alike her father. She only had her fathers eyes. She was positive and was never worried. Konno-sensei was negative and worried about everything. That made them both unique, having different way of caring.

"Konno-sensei, what are you doing here?" He looked at me if I was stupid.

"Seeing my daughter and my adoptive children of to the exam?" Misaki looked at her father and put a hand on his shoulder. She barely reached when her father was very tall. Almost as tall as Ryuu. He had almost snow white hair. His hair was cut short but behind his ear he saved hair and every morning he made a braid of it. He didn't let me cut his hair with a scissor but let me cut it with a knife. In that way, his hair was also uneven. He was muscular and always had a good stance.

"When did I become your 'adoptive child'?" Ryuu was staring at the old man with his forest green eyes.

"When you stepped into my library..." Konno-sensai made it sound obvious.

"Does that mean you're family with every visitor?"

"Of coures not. How would that look?" Ryuu was just about saying something but then he regret it.  
"Forget it." They always fought and never took a break before someone of them gave up. This time Ryuu had to give up. I knew what he thought. He wanted to save energy to the exam. That was also the most wise decision I ever seen him made. I looked at Misaki and we started to laughing. Ryuu fought himself to hide a smile but he failed. This was the day we had been waiting for. We were ready to take the entrance exam at _the_ _Spiritual Arts Academy_ \- Shin'ō Academy _._ Today was the Day.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Then it happened. The moment I had been waiting for – the gate opened. I couldn't really believe my eyes but... It was so beautiful. The headquarters was more beautiful then I ever could imagine. I had tried to look over the walls. Every time I was visiting Keis grave, I always tried to look and figure out how it was on the inside. The white buildings, the training grounds, the dorms and whatever the walls was hiding. How did they train? How did they live? Was... _he_ still there? I cursed myself. I couldn't have anything distracting me – not now. This was the day of my life. We said our goodbyes to Konno-sensei and together we stepped into the headquarters. As soon as I did that...

I felt something I hadn't felt in a long time. A strong spiritual pressure. It was like the walls was the only thing that protected the citizens from the reiatsu. I held my breath. We were in a group of people and no one seemed to react like me. Not even Misaki or Ryuu. Last time I felt something like this was when I met _him_ but... this was different. It was another kind of pressure. It was strong but another kind of strength.

"Ayame-chan, look." Misaki pointed at a figure come towards us. A Death God came before us. I never expected a Death God to look like that. I had gotten an image that they were elegant and in a scary way beautiful. Black tattoos covered sides of his neck and his chest. He had a red bandana that covered even more tattoos that looked like being a part of his eyebrows. He had his crimson red hair in a high ponytail. He wore the black uniform and... I recognized his badge he had on his arm. He was the vice lieutenant of squad 6. I could never forget that symbol. It was almost as my heart stopped beating.

"Abarai Renji, vice lieutenant of squad 6. I'm here to show you punks to the entrance exam. So, follow me if you dare." He didn't even stand still. He didn't even looked at us. He turned around and started walking back again. I was surprised that the fact that a person with high position helped few wannabes. It could only mean that he had done something and this was his punishment for it. I couldn't help to wonder what that it was. I stared at the badge. That symbol had been stuck in my head like glue for years. Did he know Kei? I didn't see him during the funeral so... did he not know Kei? I knew that everyone didn't attend funerals but if they worked at the same squad... and Kei was only one seat away from him.. weren't they close?

"Squad 6...?" A whisper came from Misaki. She had picked up the words. She turned against me and took my hand. She looked so worried. Her big ice blue eyes looking like she was a deer - prepared to be hit by a car. I didn't realized that I had spaced away. I swallowed and watered my lips to be able to speak.

"He probably worked with Kei." Now was it Ryuus turn to act. He laid his hand on my shoulder.

"You knew this was going to happen if you stepped inside here. Suck it up." Of course I knew. I knew that many of the Death Gods had probably met Kei before. Persons I didn't even heard about. Misaki squeezed my hand and smiled at me.

"Do you want to speak about something else?" I nodded. Just for awhile I didn't want to remember Kei's death. I knew that it was the only reason I was me but sometimes I wanted to feel like I came here by my own power. Misaki and Ryuu had that ability. That was why I reconsidered them my friends. Misaki didn't even think about what to talk about. She was already steps ahead of me. She knew what to say even before the conservation started. She was her father daughter after all.

"Did you expect it to look like this?" That's right. Misaki, Ryuu-san and I often talked about how it could be like and look like inside. Now, we were here. We were so curios before this. What we knew was that the buildings near the wall was closer then them in the center. Misaki said that she believed the headquarters was made to keep the outsider away so, by creating a maze in the outer sector they could find the outsider before the outsider could learn to navigate. It sounded truly amazing and her theory sounded possible. It looked possible too. Ryuu thought different about that matter. He said that he thought Gotei 13 was expanding and by creating new buildings in the outer sector they could put the most important positions in the middle. They discussed it for hours and Misaki, who probably had read every written piece inside the library, always came with examples that made her theory more suitable. I knew that they wouldn't get any answers by doing this but... then I noticed something. The way the looked at each other. The way the held each other on the edge that made them as good as they could be. Ryuu was mocking Misaki so often he could - just to get her attention. I decided then that love was sweet... as long it wasn't one sided. Which it was in this case, when Misaki wasn't aware. She was so smart that she didn't even see what was in front of her.

"I said it before, didn't I?" We didn't have to repeat the discussion. We all knew what he meant by that statement. Ryuu smiled one of the biggest smiles I had ever seen. He wasn't the one to smile. He was the serious one of us but he was also the most competitive of us. He always wanted to be right and when he was he was a bad winner too. "Gotei 13 did expand and to make room for the new Death Gods they make the buildings more compact." Misaki looked at me and I stopped spacing out. I couldn't say anything about it. All I could do was to wait for Ryuu-san to make his move – his real move. She didn't say anything against him before I nodded. She wanted to make sure I was okay.

"Yes, I remember but we don't know if your right yet." Misaki was however a good loser. She hated to be wrong but she didn't blame anyone else but herself. She mumbled like an old lady. She would spend hours in books after this. I sighed. I had to say something or else they would be busy trying to prove each other wrong.

"I think that you're both right. The path is too complex. If you wanted to squeeze everything together you should just do so. This is like a maze." Misaki and Ryuu stared at me and were just about to start talking when Abarai Renji stopped walkning.

"Punks, stop talking. We're here"


	4. Chapter 4

_**Chapter 4**_

Before us was a great building. It was like a castle but I knew that I would have to get used with that feeling if I was suppose to study here. This was The Spiritual Art Academy. It was like looking at art – you didn't understand it's beauty at first but as the time went on you got more and more capture. I knew that I belonged here by the thought studying here. I had to make it into this school. The white building formed an u and had three roofs upon each other. I couldn't see the courtyard over the wall, going around the school like a fence but something told me that it was the training-ground. I had seen the academy from the distance but I had never believed that I would have any connection to it. Who would think that something this great was you destiny? Well, I hoped it was my destiny. I hadn't passed yet. I looked down at my right foot. I was standing on something. A piece of paper. I took it up and were just about the read it when I heard the lieutenant making a fuss.

The lieutenant, Abarai Renji, walked to the gate and started to look for something in his sleeves. He highly sighed to show us that he really didn't care about this but because this was his obligation he would make it to the end. I couldn't help but frown. Was this the best person for this job? Didn't they want new students? The first impression was one of the most important moments. Kei would never had done something like that. He would have had control. Abarai Renji looked at us with critical eyes and... at what I had in my hands. He looked for that paper.

"You, girl, what's that you holding in your hand? Give it to me!" He didn't even know if this was the note he was looking for. Something told me that it probably was - I was used to be that unlucky. I, who didn't want to have any problems, always got problems. Couldn't the Spirit King give me an easy time before the most important day in my life?

"I found it on the ground." That didn't help at all.  
"Abarai-fukutaicho to you." I wasn't used to used to be that formal and call people by rank. I stared at him as if I could take him down with giving him the creeps. I didn't move. Why would I? He was too arrogant for his own good. Did he think he could live on old merits or something? I made up my mind. I wouldn't give him the pleasure to having me looking up to him. I would give him the pleasure to look up to me. Kei wanted to move hearts and that was what I planned to do... but with other solutions. Misaki and Ryuu looked at me and when I didn't react...

"I'm sorry, Abarai-fukutaicho." Ryuu took the note from my hands and stepped forward and handed him the note. Ryuu gave me the evil eye. I could tell what he was thinking and I knew he understood me. That didn't make it okay. I knew that. Misaki just looked surprised. I was always the person that acted before anyone else. Misaki gave me a small smile and articulated with her lips: 'We are not in place of doing anything stupid.'

I looked at the lieutenant and in a millisecond did my eyes met with the lieutenants. He stared at me as if he had seen a ghost. Just for a short while. So short that if you didn't study his movement you wouldn't have seen it. He looked even.. scared? Or was that wrong word? He snapped out of it. Maybe he had seen an illusion. He cleared his throat.

"I didn't come here to chit-chat with you, newbies. Let's get down to business," He took a deep breath and then continued. "I'm starting calling up the first group to do the exam."

"Konno Misaki," Misaki took a step forward. I could hear people in the crowd starting to whisper comments to each other. I hadn't noticed it but the crowd was about 90% boys. She was a beauty, with her brown hair that always got capture in the breeze at the right moment. Her big eyes that always seemed to show the truth. She looked back at me and Ryuu with a big smile. I leered at Ryuu. Why couldn't he just say that he liked her? The way he looked at her right now was almost irritating. His green eyes sparkled.

"Shiro Ryuu," They were meant to be together - or - at least take the test at the same time. This time, did the other 10% of the crowd sighed. The lieutenant waited a long while. He looked down at the paper and frowned. He nodded to himself. What was that about? Did he... did he remember Kei? That could explain why he had that reaction earlier. I begged that he would say my name. What a dream team we would be. I didn't know how the test was tested but if it was a team exam...

"Tamako Ayame,"

Thank you, Spirit King. I knew that I was bad at praying to him sometimes but... it was on occasion like this I decided that I... perhaps... believed in him. I didn't realized that everybody – except for Misaki, Ryuu and the lieutenant – freezed. It wasn't just me. I saw everyone in the area turn around to look at me. I wasn't the one to have flashbacks all the time but this situation reminded me when I didn't know the name of the Captain of squad 6. This was the same. I didn't know something that seemed to be important. Was it something with the group? Was it because we got called out first? But why didn't this reaction start when Misaki or Ryuu got called up?

"She's the younger sister of Tamako Kei, the former 3th seat of squad 6!"  
"Hey, isn't Konno the last name of the clan that's supporting the Gotei 13 archives?"  
"Who's the guy then? If he's hanging out with them I'm sure he's a talented kid."

Misaki, Ryuu and I was just standing there. What was we supposed to do? I looked up and the lieutenant was already on the move. He clapped his hands one time. The eco made everyone quiet.  
"Group 1, go inside and wait for the next instructions." We walked pass the lieutanent in to the gate but before I was able to pass him he laid his hand on my shoulder.

"I wondered how long it would take for you to show up."


	5. Chapter 5

_**Chapter 5**_

A part of me wanted it to be _him_. That it was _he_ who said to _his_ lieutenant that I would come here – sooner or later. Was that possibility impossible? It probably was. It was five years ago that _he_ told me that I should follow Kei's footsteps. To have the feeling of being remembered, to have the feeling that someone waited just for me. I felt a warmth in my heart. I knew that the funeral wasn't as an important day to _him_ as it was for me. The Captain was an important person: a funeral and helping people in need was _his_ work. I cursed myself. I had met _him_ once and yet... I was head over heels for my savior. I needed to stop thinking about _him_ as a hero. That was the reason I didn't say or even thought _his_ name. This fantasy of mine needed to have an end. For everyones sake... but who could forget the way _his_ black hair fell through the air and those dark blue eyes, only with a touch of grey, saw everything? Straight to your soul.

I played the comment again in my head. _"I wondered how long it would take for you to show up."_

What other reason was it to say that comment? By the lieutenants reaction he seemed to know Kei or at least recognize his last name. He maybe heard that Kei had a sister. Kei was a raw talent and perhaps the lieutenant thought that I was it too. That sounded more possible... but I was afraid that Abarai Renji would be disappointed. I cursed myself again. Why was it so hard to just think about things that normal people would react to? Like the way the other potential students whispered about Misaki, Ryuu and I. I knew that Misaki and Ryuu was in deep thoughts about it. I looked at them. Yes, they didn't even look up. It was just that I was so used to gossip. Everyone saw me as the girl that lost her brother. I was never me. I was something he left. I wanted to prove everyone wrong.

Misaki, Ryuu and I had entered the Spiritual Arts Academys training ground. It was bigger then I thought it would be. Dark brown barracks made of wood were placed on the sides – three on each side. They were probably builded just for this occasion. In the middle of the courtyard stood a young man with blonde hair. He had a bang that covered half of his face and had weird black eyebrows too. Was it something with having weird looking eyebrows and being a lieutenant?

"My name's Izuru Kira. I'm the vice lieutenant of squad 3. If you succeed to enter the Academy you will see that I'm a teacher here, in Haiku." He looked down on his hands as he talked. Did he read from his hands? I saw black letters. His voice were trembling. Was he that nervous? Then what was we supposed to feel?

"Now, you will enter each a different barrack and start the exam. The exam includes two parts. When you go inside the barrack you will see a seat standing in the middle of the room. At the end of the room you will see a wallpaper. Don't get close to it. Your judges sits there. Answer the questions when you done you flip the test upside down. The second part will be explained by one of the responsible judges for each barrack. We have put up a shield, so don't be scared if you should lost control." Misaki looked like she just woken up from a wonderful dream. As she had realized the meaning behind life. She shined like the sun as she took my and Ryuus hands. Ryuu was as paralyzed as I was. We just stood there as two fouls.

"What ever happens... listen to the voice inside of you. I know you hear it." The voice inside of us? I knew what she meant by it. She talked about the Zanpakutō, the Soul-Cutter Sword. Had she... had she heard hers? I had never even tried to hear it. I had never even dreamed about it. When I read about it I thought most of it was just a thing in peoples head. Having a sword that spoke to you? In the same time I was so jealous. Having someone that was with you, all the time. A part of your soul that you could speak to? I knew that Misaki and Ryuu would do anything for me but the loneliness took me as soon that I was alone. I knew the most talented Death Gods heard the voice in early age. Maybe I was destined to have an Asauchi. That wasn't bad either... but to never know the name of the sword. Who could accept it just like that? I observed Ryuu. He smiled. He just smiled like she understood exactly what she talked about. Did he also heard a voice? Was I the only one of us?

"Konno Misaki, Barrack 1" She let go of our hands and I looked after her. I didn't want her to be the first to go. She looked so weak... but I knew - I and Ryuu knew. That she probably was the strongest of us. She had never lost anything. She was never afraid. At least not at the same rate that I and Ryuu had experienced.

"Shiro Ryuu, Barrack 2. Tamako Ayame, Barrack 3." Ryuu patted me on the head and looked into my eyes. He shined with confident. I took a deep breath. I couldn't let them do this on their own. We walked towards our barrack and after a last glimpse on each other we were ready. I touched the slightly rusty handle and pushed it to get inside.

"Hello..?" No one said a single word. That was totally the wrong impression to show the judges. I walked into the barrack and made sure the door behind closed. It made a terrible sound but I ignored it. Yes, it all was as Izuru Kira said. In the middle of the room stood a table and a chair. I saw the paper from here and a never used pencil. In front of me was a biggest curtain I ever seen, not that I had seen many in the first place. It was made with a beautiful expensive fabric with a red background and flowers in white. How could I stay focused if I had all my attention on what kind of things you could do with the fabric. I shook my head and sat down on the chair. I needed to get started. I didn't know how much time I had.

 _ **Questions**_.

 **Why did you decide that you want to attend this school and why do you think you have what it takes?**

I stared down at the paper. Was this an exam? Was it something that was suppose to be hard with this question? I thought that they would test out abilities - not our reasons. I wanted to write something like: 'Five years ago was the worst day of my life. I lost my brother to a mission I still heard nothing about. All I knew was that he sacrificed himself for dozens. He was everything to me and when I lost myself a man came from nowhere. He told me to get a dream or take upon myself to uphold my brothers pride. He wanted to protect those in need. To be able to protect everyone, I need to become a Death God. I don't know if I have what it takes. I'm a hardworker and I have decided to give it my best.' But that was information I didn't want to give to everyone. I just wrote: ' I want to protect everyone like I always been protected. I have willpower.'

 **Imagine this: A hollow attacks your hometown but you are ordered to stay back for further instructions. What do you do?**

I frowned. How was I suppose to answer something like this? It was classic that I would write that I would have waited for instructions. It was what they wanted me to write. It wasn't something I would write. ' I would never let innocent people get hurt.'

 **Have you heard a voice or dreamed a dream that you felt was real/had effects when you woke up?**

They just waited to ask this questions. I had no answer. 'No.'

I put down the pencil and looked at my answers. I wasn't proud of it at all. I could see that they made room for over thousands of letters on one question. I had written less then two hundred on three. I could have written much more. It was just that all it would say was of matters that they didn't care about or things I thought was to private. I could have left it blank. What I had answered was what most people would said. The first part sucked. I turned the paper upside down and stood up.


	6. Chapter 6

_**Chapter 6**_

"And now?" I heard someone write on the other side of the curtain. Yes, they probably wrote down every single detail. The way I moved, the way I talked and what I had answered on the first part of the test. I only hoped that the second test was something that I really could show my potential. I closed my eyes for a moment. I couldn't sense anything in this room. Everything was well hidden. The lieutanent of squad 3 was right. It was a shield around this barrack. I looked at the table before me. From nowhere came a ball made of crystal. In the same time it appeared I could sense two persons behind the curtain. I couldn't help but wonder who does two were. I couldn't sense anything special when it was on such a short notice. Two persons that watched me. I placed my hands on the ball and held it. It was cold first but as soon as all my fingertips touched the crystal it became warm. What was I supposed to do with this?

"I want you to form your reiatsu inside the crystal ball." It was a mans voice. I couldn't identify anything with it. I would recognize it if I heard it again. He wanted me to do... what? I had never focused my spiritual pressure. It was something that I hoped I could learn inside the academy. They had to be a mistake. I couldn't do that.

"You want me to... what?"

"You heard." I hadn't heard it wrong. I looked down at the crystal. What was I suppose to do? I thought about it. It was like putting something inside me into something else, wasn't it? I took a deep breath and stared at the core of the ball. I felt something within me move. I focused that and tried to move it into the crystal. Nothing happened. Nothing. Couldn't I do it? Didn't I have a reiatsu? It... it was impossible. I tried again. I stood there for over 15 minutes. What did I do wrong? When I met the Captain at the funeral it was all over the place. He was the one who turned it down. It was like he had pushed an off button. Couldn't I do it now? Why? What was different between now and then? I felt tears behind my eyes. I couldn't cry here. I closed my eyes. I was trembling.

" _Focus._ "

My heart stopped beating. That voice. I knew that voice. It was the voice I heard every time I was on the egde to give up. The voice that was like a light in the dark. I knew that one of the judges behind the wallpaper wasn't _him_. The other person... Could it be him? It had to be. It was _his_ voice. Why _he_ here? Had _he_ seen this? Was it even possible that a Captain was judging a students entrance exam? I opened my eyes and stared at the flower fabric but then... I stared into the thin air. In that moment. All of my spiritual pressure conquered the room. The crystal ball exploded and it turned first into petals and then into something that looked like glitter. Like a fairy had come into the room and made everything sparkle. A yellow almost golden light came from me. My hair left the black small ribbon that was holding my hair in a knot and my hair fell over my shoulders. The power swept the whole room. My heart was pounding and it felt like it was going to burst out of my chest.

" _Your spiritual energy is out of control. Try to calm down and it will stop._ "

It was the same words, exactly the same words from five years ago. _He_ was here. I couldn't sense _his_ pressure but my soul knew. I could let go. I wasn't scared if _he_ was here. My knees lost their strength and I fell to the floor. I knew it would hurt. I would fall on my head and pass out. I thought it was going to hurt but it didn't. Someone caught me in the fall. I couldn't see who it was. I was so dizzy. It was like looking into a white mist. Like a fog that was impossible to look through. I waited to feel cold but the arms that was around me was warm. It was like coming home to the place I belonged. I heard my voice in my head as an eco.

"Who are you?" I closed my eyes. Everything was spinning around. I would pass out, it was just a matter of time. I couldn't let go of my consciences. I had to know. I continued when I didn't get a response. "What's your name..?" This was like a flashback.

"You know that already. You remember..." It wasn't the same answer. A part of me got a bit worried. Wasn't this him? It had to be. The only person that knew these words was him and when I analyzed the voice I heard confident. He remembered me too. I tried to move but my muscles didn't listen to me. They didn't listen to the smart part of me.  
"When will we get the results?" I could hear someone laugh at me. The white mist began to turn black. I had only seconds left.

"It takes time for the judges to declare which class you will join... if you passed the test."  
"Thank you... for earlier and now." Everything went silent. I couldn't see the saviors reaction or anything. The last thing that happened to me could have been an illusion. It had to be... but I promised that I felt lips kissing my forehead.

I didn't know how long time I was out but when I woke up it was because of someone shaking me. It wasn't the nice wakeup call that Kei used to do. This was a shake in panic, trying to awake me from the dead. Had something happened? I gasped for air and opened my eyes. Misaki was leaning over me and had her hands on my shoulders. Her nails were in my flesh but it didn't hurt. Not as much as my head. My head pounded like it was hit by a hammer over and over.  
"Ayame-chan! What happened?!" I opened my lips to talk but my throat was dry like the desert. What happened? Just when I asked myself that question everything came back to me like a boomerang. This was laughable. Everything that happened was a joke. Who fainted on an exam? Not every exam but an entrance exam? It wasn't only that but the judge had caught me when I fell. If someone other then Misaki and Ryuu knew I would stand out as an idiot. I couldn't say every detail to them. I could tell them about the first part and that I crossed the crystal like it was nothing. I wouldn't tell them about what had activated that power or that a judge helped me when I was falling to the floor. When I told them about the Captain and the funeral they said that it was just to make me feel better. I wanted it to be more then that. I frowned. I had forgot something even more important. What was that power I used? Was it really my power?

"Give her some space, she must have overdo the second part of the exam."  
"But look at her, Ryuu-kun! She's pale like snow and her clothes... It looks like she was in a fight or something! The hole in her kimono looks like someone cut her right over her chest and don't forget the small cuts!" Misaki was totally freaking out. I looked down at my yellow kimono and she was right. The kimono I was wearing was completely destroyed. I would have been sad if I didn't knew that it was time to buy a new one. I took up my hand and stroked with my fingertips on the cuts. I didn't have a single scratch and I didn't feel any pain. Was it even possible that... Then I remembered.

"I broke the crystal..." My voice didn't fail me. I made the crystal into petals that destroyed my kimono but not my skin. Normally when something like this happened someone would have gotten serious damage. I just had a headache. I had heard about a Death God that had a shika that was like sakura petals. I would gladly have a Zanpakutō like that... if I only could hear the voice. Misaki and Ryuu didn't hear what I was saying.

"I will go talk to the lieutenants. They maybe have a place we can put her..." Misaki shook her head and stared Ryuu down. He became quiet. She wouldn't let go of this that easy and Ryuu didn't want to argue with her in subjects that he didn't chose.  
"Ask for division 4! They're specialized in this kind of things!" Division 4? She meant Squad 4? She wanted to ask the Gotei 13 for help just for this accident? I couldn't allow that. I tried to get up on my feet and if it wasn't for Ryuu that held me up I would have fallen again. This really took all my energy.

"I'm okay, Misaki-chan. I'm not hurt. I broke the crystal and it was its doing... I'm fine.. I'm just exhuasted." She didn't believe me but she sighed. She knew that if I really didn't want to do it then nothing stood in my way. Misaki gave Ryuu a short gaze and without even saying any words to each other he lifted me up like I was a princess. I hated when they used their telepathic connection. I freezed and started to move so that he would lost his grip. Misaki laid a calm hand on my shoulder. I looked down at Misaki. I was higher up then I was when I stood up. I didn't want to fall down. Not at all. I held on to Ryuu's green shirt.

"Save your energy. You will need it tomorrow when we get our results."


	7. Chapter 7

_**Chapter 7**_

I had never had a better sleep. It was the first time for over five years I slept in peace. I didn't wake up in the middle of the night, wide awake after being hunted by monster. I didn't wake up after hearing someone scream as they got killed by the shadows. I slept through the whole night and even a few hours more. I always heard Keis voice when I slept to long but he was silent today. He maybe knew what I was going through and let me rest for once. I closed my eyes. What had I just experienced? It was nothing like what I had imagine. Then... no one thinks that the most important day of our life will go to hell. To hell was to overreact but it sucked. The first part was fiasco and the second part was an explosion. Literally. My pride got hurt in the process, both physically and mentally. I showed way more skin then I realized after the entrance exam but thanks to Ryuu no one noticed it. He covered me up by pushing me to his chest. He carrying me all the way home damaged my pride probably more. I would never let someone carry me again not while I was consciences... but I did pass out in his arms half way home. The only thing that didn't damaged me was when I was in _his_ arms. My heart aced after it. Why didn't _he_ hold me longer? Why did I wake up with Misaki and Ryuu by my side? Why didn't _he_ stay with me? It was an egoistic way of thinking. What would it look like if I got carried away by the Captain? Maybe it was for the best.

I had just got out of bed when I, by accident, stepped on a package. I blinked about hundreds of times and stood there like a question mark. Why did I have a black box with a red silk ribbon next to my bed? I had never had something that exclusive in my room, or, room and room. It was an attic, but I counted that as a room. I had a small window, a bed and a mirror. It was enough for me. When Kei died I had no money to still live in a house. I lived on the street for a while and one day I was near to join a group that did.. horrible things. I only thought of saving up money so that I could get into the Academy. Nothing else mattered... not how I got the money. It was then I met Misaki for the first time and she opened her home to a stranger. Her father, Konno Daisuke, was alright with the idea too. I had met Konno Daisuke some weeks before Misaki, so now he didn't just offer me a place to study but also a home. They were strange people, the Konno family. I couldn't help but smile thinking about it. I would never opened up my home to a young girl that was on the edge to do illegal stuff.

I looked down on the unknown object. My eyes narrowed. What was it? It was probably Ryuu, Misaki or her father that had put it there... if not... I was so stupid! I falled down on my knees and throwed myself over the box. Could it be..?! The results?! I wanted to tore the ribbon into pieces but that would be insane to do. I pulled the ribbon of the box and folded it. I could use that to tie up my hair instead of the black ribbon I lost after the second part of the entrance exam. Dear Spirit King, this was my only wish. I had fought so hard to get here. Please, be on my side for once, if not for me then for Kei. I opened the package.

Everything just stopped like that, even time. I couldn't get my eyes of it. What would Kei had done? What would he had said in this moment? He always did his best and got the best results. What would he had said? What would he had said if I said that I didn't give everything I had to the test? Then again... It was enough. I hade done enough. I cried like a baby, but who wouldn't had? I could hear his voice inside my head. "You are my sister, we are more alike then you think. You see yourself in the mirror and agree that you see a piece of me... but you don't understand... we even have the same personality and talent. Of course you passed. You're a Tamako."

It wasn't of course to me. I had made it. In the package was the uniform. The red under shirt, the white shirt with red stripes, red trousers, white socks and sandals. The circular symbols were also there. Placed on the outer shirt on both breasts. I took up them and pushed then to my chest. I heard someone run up the stairs and Misaki opened the door in a hurry. She had already put on her uniform and it looked even better on. She looked like a Death God... or... a Death God to be at least. She looked like a warrior. The red color of her uniform matched her light brown hair and the blue eyes made a beautiful contrast. A warrior and a princess. She smiled like the sun.

"We did it, Ayame-chan!" She looked down the stairs and dragged in Ryuu into the room. He smiled too. It was one of his most rarest smiles. His forest green eyes were focused on Misaki and his snow white hair was for once combed. I could bet that it was Misakis doing, wanting him to look like a real warrior. And well, he really did. He looked like a prince that could kill a dragon if necessary. He looked strong and his uniform showed his atletic body. His uniform was like mine and Misakis but instead of the red color he wore a blue one.

"I see we all passed." I wiped away my tears. I was so glad. It felt that I was inside a dream - not a nightmare. This was the first step to uphold Kei's pride. What waited now was 6 years of intensive study and then I could say infront of his grave that I did my best after he died.

"Of course we did. The only question now is what class we will be in. I hope you all showed quality to come to the first class!" Ouch, Why did Misaki have to bring that up? I wasn't sure about that. The first class... you had to ace the entrance exam to even be considered. I hadn't done that. I didn't know how well Ryuu or Misaki did but it would surprise me if they didn't make it to the first class. That reminded me. I hadn't asked them how the exam went for them. I was just about to speak when Ryuu took the opportunity to come with his... thoughts.

"Do you really believe that anyone of us will be applied to the first class? We maybe have passed the test but Ayame-chan exploded the crystal on the second part, you didn't write anything on the first part and I started a fight with my judge. I don't know if that is first class material." Misaki and Ryuu did... what?! I was shock. I couldn't close my mouth. The smartest person I knew decided to don't write anything on her test?! Was she stupid or something? I thought that I had done a bad job but.. leaving it totally blank?! Ryuu had temper and made people angry very easy but how do you even get into a fight with someone that only says the instructions?! What kind of judge did he had? What had he done to get a judge mad? The only time he have to keep quiet and he didn't?!

"You make it sound so bad. We made an impression." An impression. The entrance exam wasn't about make yourself stand out. It was about doing it right and show exactly what they wanted to see. Nothing more. Nothing less. Or was I wrong? Was it good to do something no one else did? Was that the reason Misaki left the first part blank? She must had a reason. She couldn't be stupid. It wasn't in her nature. It was something that maybe Ryuu or I could done by mistake but Misaki..? Ryuu wouldn't fight a judge without reason but he had probably showed talent. That could save him. I didn't know if Misakis reasons saved her. I spoked up.

"It's different between a good impression or a bad impression." Ryuu continued on my words.

"Let me add some word that described the situation: our impression sucked." Misaki was trying to save herself from this seat she had: trying to defend that any impression was good. She knew that both Ryuu and I had our thoughts in stone in this matter.

"Okay, so what?" I had never heard Misaki be arrogant. It was more Ryuus style. "The most important part was that we passed and if they hadn't remeberd us we wouldn't have passed. What awaits us now is fate. Speaking of which. Lets go get our stuff. We're going to the Academy right away!" Now I understood. She just wanted to make sure she was remembered. She didn't care how. Ryuu was a person that you didn't forget because of his temper and his habit to always argue. I had a famous last name within the Gotei 13 squads and totally overdid the last part of the exam. Impression was something that made you remembered, for better and for worse – but never forgotten.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Chapter 8**_

It took an hour to get ready for the time of my life. I didn't own much so for me it was mostly changing clothes and put up my hair in a ponytail. I had never realized that I had so long hair. It were down at my behind. When did it grow so much? When... when did I start to look like a grown up? My light brown eyes stared back at me in the mirror. My heart shaped head looked so smooth that it made my raspberry colored lips stand out. My dark eyebrows formed my round eyes like a frame. My eyelashes were dark like my eyebrows and looked like butterfly wings. I had never notice it before. When... when did I take the step from cute to beautiful? I turned around and looked at my high ponytail. My blond hair had highlights and the red ribbon made it shine even more. I looked... hot. Were you allowed to think that about yourself?

I walked down from the attic. The only thing I needed to have with me was Kei's favorite necklace. The one he got from a friend after being accepted into the Academy. I looked down at it as I held it in my hand. It was a extraordinary. It was a metal chain that had a dark golden crystal pendant. I put it on and felt the cold chain touch my skin. What a friend to give a gift like this one. I was ready now. I took a deep breath and entered the living room. Ryuu had waited for about half an hour and he seemed to be really tiered of waiting. He was so excited that time seemed to crawl forward for him. He looked at me with hope and stood up from the armchair.

"Are you done now? Please, I can't sit here and wait any longer." I laughed and nodded.

"Yes, where's Misaki? We have to go now. We don't want to be late for the ceremony." Ryuu pointed at the door. Was she outside already? I didn't believe that she would like to leave her home without at least go through a couple of books. Now it seemed like we were waiting for me. Well, better late than never. We walked together to the front door and outside stood Konno Daisuke on the street with his beloved daughter. Konno-sensei said something and Misaki looked really upset. Had something happened? Or was she just sad that we now would go live in a dormitory and don't have same connection to the library?

"If you need anything at all. Squad 12 should have your back at any time. Just tell them who you are and they will open their doors for you. I promise that I will be back soon, it's just a short trip for one of the noble families. Don't worry about me." Squad 12? Wasn't it a part of the science and research department? It made however sense. If Konno-sensei had the biggest library in Soul Society it was natural that people needed to get information. Misaki just nodded and seconds later she had her arm around Konno-sensei in a big hug. I could see a smile on Konno-senseis face. Was this the true light of a family? A family with blood ties? I missed Kei so much. Misaki kissed the scar on his jaw. Konno-sensei turned around and looked at Ryuu and I.

"I will give you some advice before entering the academy. You choose yourself if you want to listen or go your own way but by my experience there are three things that you always should reconsider.

Don't ever let go of each other. You don't understand the power of friendship. At the Academy you will met people that will go the dirty way to ruin you. They are driven by jealousy and if you trust them to much in the beginning they can blackmail you. Stay close to each other.

Listen to everything your teachers says. They know what you need to know when you later go out on the fields and they also know when you have to step down. Don't show of and try to prove you're the best one. Be kindhearted and open for new options.

Don't ever. I repeat. Never, try to challenge a hollow alone. You maybe just be first years but it will come a time when you will met the real thing. They are stronger then you think and if you're not ready you will have to put your life on the line. "

That was not a pep talk at all. I stared at Konno-sensei. He was serious. I looked at both Ryuu and Misaki and they looked like their breath were taken away. What a speech. I understood the first advice. We were there to practice and learn but for some it was a competition. The second advice was just like the promise I made to Kei. I would stick to the rules and do my best to be able to protect those in need and in the same time be nice and be a teammate. Just as Kei was. The third advice was obvious. I didn't have a death wish. I didn't want to think that my powers were stronger then they actually were.

"Ryuu-kun, you will find yourself at home at the Academy. You don't know much about your past even if you think you do. If you find anyone that are interested in Squad 10 you should reconsider them as your friend – youo belong to squad 10, but remember my first advice." I turned around and looked at Ryuu. He was speechless. Why... why did Konno-sensei say that Ryu belonged to squad 10? Did... did his past have something to do with that Squad? Ryuu didn't seem to know what he meant by that either. Konno-sensei smiled to all of us but then looked straight at me.

"Ayame-chan... can I talk to you alone?" Misaki and Ryuu understood the situation and they started to walk towards the wall – in to the Academy. I looked at Konno-sensei and his appearance changed like the clock turning from 23:59 to 00:00. It was like another day. His jaws were clenched and it looked like he was in some kind of inner fight. His smile disappeared. He looked like a commander, not a father that cared about his children.

"I know that it was a few years ago and that you probably already left most parts of it behind. There are things I however need to tell you. I have been asked to stay silent for so long but I can't do it any longer. You have to know before you get close to the Gotei 13. and... only you can find out the whole truth." I stared at him. What was he about to say? Something... that I had left behind? Few years ago.. he couldn't mean. It was the only thing he could mean.

"Do you remember when you got the letter from Gotei 13 with that necklace inside? Were it stood that Tamako Kei had died during an important mission after saving his comrades lives? I don't think it's the whole story." Of course, I remembered that stupid letter. It had haunted my dreams for so long. I wore the necklace now in the honor of him. What did he mean about it wasn't the whole story?! What other story could it be?! Kei saved lives, it didn't have to be another story.

"If you read the archives you see that no one else was injured after the mission was complete – only him. They said that he saved dozens of people but why do they say he saved anyone when no one were in danger?" Did... did Konno-sensei just say that Kei wasn't suppose to die? That someone had tricked him to come there? That.. it was a trap? That it was a set up by.. no... the Gotei 13 couldn't have... Kei dedicated his life to them. They already had his life. They couldn't betray him... or could they?

"Did... Gotei 13..?" Konno-sensei shook his head and erupted my thoughts.

"No, the Gotei 13 are innocent but someone within has mixed with the truth. I don't know why but that's why I'm traveling today. A dear friend of mine have found some lost evidence. All I want to say to you is that someone was after Kei for some reason and they got him. We have to find him and... now when you are joining the Spiritual Art Academy that someone maybe sets his or hers focus on you. I need you to know that you're safe as long as you stay within the Academy. If you go outside the walls your reiatsu will be harder to find." Something was wrong. The way he used the words. That someone got him? That we have to find him? I stared at him. I screamed inside my head but my voice were so clear.

"You don't think Kei's dead."  
"I don't." Nothing made sense.  
"You think the same person can be targeting me."  
"Yes, that's why you will be safe inside the Academy. As long as you don't go outside the wall."

"What... what can I do?" I knew the answer even if my mind were spinning. I had to defend myself. I had to become stronger and a better Death God then Kei was. Not only to be able to protect everyone but also be able to protect myself. But why? Why was he a target? Why did I become a target because of that?

"You will train to become the Death God you were meant to be and let me take care of this puzzle. I just want you to stay safe until I come back. Stay away from Squad 6. Listen carefully. _Stay away from Squad 6_."


	9. Chapter 9

_**Chapter 9**_

Kei was alive... no... Kei was _perhaps_ alive. I couldn't think about him as alive. It didn't make any sense and it was too hard to handle. The thought about it made me so empty. Was he hiding? Then why hadn't he contacted me? Was he aware that I attended his funeral and was near to destroy myself in the process? That was stupid questions. He didn't want me to get involved in his business. He had to make it look real... yes.. If he was alive it was the only way. This wasn't a game. This was life and death. I could hear Keis voice inside my head. "Please, Ayame. Take care of yourself until I come back." Yes... the last words he said to me before he left for the mission. It was the words I was suppose to listen to.

I couldn't understand Konno-senseis last sentence. No... I understood his sentence but I didn't want to listen to it. It was like they passed right through me. He couldn't be speaking the truth. Why would I believe him? Why would I believe that Kei was alive? Just because he said it? I hadn't seen any clues about it but he just... knows? Konno-sensei was only the one that cared for me after Kei... he was only the one that gave me everything I needed and even more for four years. I couldn't doubt him. He was one of Keis most reliable friends. I remember one time when Kei spoked about Konno Daisuke. I didn't understand that it was him before I saw Konno-sensei for the first time. The scar on his jaw was from a hollow attack their third year at the Spiritual Arts Academy. They were in the same group and after saving each others lives they became close friends. If Konno-sensei doubted Squad 6 I was suppose to do that to... but why?

Why would I stay away from Squad 6? Did.. did it count everyone within the Squad? _He_ was within Squad 6. _He_ was the one that ordered that squad... _he_... was the Captain of Squad 6. _He_ was my savior, the one that gave me a motive to keep on moving and become something more then just an ordinary girl. _He_ saved me from falling to the floor on the exam. If _he_ wanted to hurt me _he_ could done it way sooner. I even fainted in _his_ arms. No, the Captain was out of the question... _he_ helped me too much. I felt relieved. I was okay with everyone except _him_. I couldn't lose thought of my hero, even if Misaki and Ryuu thought it just was a bad fairy tail, and gain a painful hope about my brother maybe being alive.

Konno-sensei looked down and saw the pendant I had around my neck. He looked first surprised then a smile came over his face. Was this talk over now? I had so much questions... but at the same time no questions at all. I trusted Konno-sensei. I had too. I would however not let him do this alone. I would get ready as fast as I could. I would become a great Death God, master Shikai and Bankai and then get going to take down the one who... killed... kidnapped or whatever with my brother. Take down the one that made me alone for all these years.

" _Focus._ " My head stood still for a while and allowed me to rest. Focus. I was taking things for granted. I only heard that voice when I was doing something wrong. What was I... I realized it fast. I was naive to think that I could master something like Kido. I was way over my to think that I could even master Shikai. I didn't have time to be able to help Konno-sensei. It would take at least 20 years to master everything perfectly and that counted as a short while. Everyone hadn't the talent do master everything. I wasn't sure I was so special that I could do it. I had to remember that Bankai was rare. Mostly Captains and a few lieutenants had that kind of power. I had even heard that few positions as Captain was open just because they couldn't find new ones that suited the rank. I was useless for now.

"I see you finally put it on the necklace... you know... Kei wore it all the time even if I said it looked like a girls jewelry. He said then that nothing were girly or boyish if you didn't allow it to be. He's probably the reason why people see me as wise." He laughed a bit. How could he laugh after this?! It was like he read my mind.  
"Ayame-chan.. please don't think to much about this. You just have to know. I have friends within the Gotei 13 that knows about this. They have promised that they will watch over for anything strange. Go with Ryuu-kun and Misaki now. They are waiting for you."

I hurried to catch up with Ryuu and Misaki. To tell the truth to myself... I ran for my life. I had to get inside to the Academy. If I only was safe there then I wanted to get there as fast as possible. Ryuu and Misaki stood already outside the wall and when I came running. They smiled with no worries at all. I lost my speed and my soul wanted to burst into thousands of pieces. A few hours ago I was just worried to not becoming a student at the Spiritual Arts Academy. Now I had to do everything in my power to become great. Great enough to not be an easy target. I took a deep breath. I should start listening to Konno-sensei. He said that I only needed to know. I had help and friends. I didn't need anything more then that.

" _Focus._ " Why... Why did I hear this voice now? I hadn't done anything. I had accepted the fact that I wasn't ready. I had accepted that I only needed friends and the oppertunity to learn. Was it something more that I needed? I didn't know what the voice meant. Why couldn't it say anything other then 'focus'? I wanted _him_ to say things that I understood. Not something poetic or a riddle.

"Come on, Ayame-chan! Why are you so slow? We have to get inside to know what class we got into. It's important! What if we don't get into same class or what if..." Ryuu sighed and shook his head. What if? Did Misaki only worry about what class she would be placed in? Was that the only worry that mattered? Ryuu thought the same as I did.  
"You're unbelievable."  
"Thank you." I looked at Misaki. She was way to happy to take anything in a bad way.  
"It wasn't a compliment."

Then I understood why Konno-sensei laughed. He needed to get himself together. He had been through so much more then I had been and I was near to give up the thought of being happy again. We needed happiness to move on. We needed happiness to be able to have hope. Friends was something that made it bearable. That was why Konno-sensei looked for Kei and still had the hope that he was alive. I had done the same thing... if anything happened to Misaki or Ryuu I would search all around the world. I wouldn't give up. I wouldn't bury them and try go on living. I wouldn't accept the fact... not if it existed evidence. Not if I hadn't seen their corpse. I looked down on the ground. I had just accepted Keis fate not realizing that something was wrong. I had failed Kei for the very beginning.

" _Try to calm down and it will stop._ " I began to laugh. This was to hard. I thought to much about it even if Konno-sensei said that I shouldn't do it. Tears started to roll down my cheeks. I just needed to cry, to let everything out. Ryuu and Misaki hurried to get to me and then we stood there, together in a circle holding on to each other.


	10. Chapter 10

_**Chapter 10**_

I had never thought it was a such a nice feeling to cry but today... it was different. I cried out of relief and after it... I felt so good. I felt almost ashamed for doing so. To say that I never felt so good before was to overdo it but everything was easier to accept. Konno-sensei would search for proof then I would really decide if I should cry or be happy. I couldn't take anything out to early. I had to cherish what I knew I had, not what I wanted to have. Misaki had done her best to make it look like I hadn't cried but my lips were still swollen. They always became like that when I was sad. Misaki, Ryuu and I stopped. The gate to the Academy wasn't open yet. That explained why it was so much people outside the Academy. I took a deep breath.

There was less students today then what it was yesterday but that wasn't a surprise. Instead of hundreds of people it was about half a hundred. It was maybe more but I didn't really count them. The ones with some kind of reiatsu were left and in all new uniforms just like we were. I had never thought about it during the beginning of the exam but here were only people with talent. Everyone stood in their group of friends and talked all loudly about how lucky they felt when they saw the package. I couldn't help but smile. I was so lucky to get this opportunity. Even if it was a lie that took me here... if he was alive...

"Look! Over there!" I turned around and saw a group of student come before us. They looked like... professionals. They had the same clothes as we had but I could tell from a distance that they were the last year students of the Academy. It was the way they hided their spiritual pressure and looked like they knew every detail of this area. They looked so happy and I understood why. They were soon to be real Death Gods. They had nothing to fear other than the last exam that was only a year preparations left to do. They laughed and joked around with each other. I would normally thought that when people acted this way it meant that they didn't take the training serious but I knew now that it was wrong. I had learned that the hard way. To have the ability to laugh proved how strong you really were. It was only one that really capture my attention. I frowned. It was only one reason for that. He looked right at me. It wasn't a mistake. He really did look at me. When I turned my back for a short while to see if he looked at someone behind me I could have sworn he started to laugh at me. He was one of the three that walked in the front. His dark brown hair – almost black – was water combed. I could have sworn that something in his eyes pupils changed form but that maybe just been a reflection of the sun. I had never seen eyes like that, purple colored eyes. He was maybe a head longer than me, which meant that he probably were only inches shorter then Ryuu. It was something more that was different with him. Under his uniform he had a white shirt that covered up his chest like he was hiding up something. A scar? A tattoo? The most important detail was however: He was the only student that carried a katana. A real one.

"That's..." Misaki looked like she didn't understand what she saw. I didn't either so I decided to look away from the group that was coming towards us and the rest of the first years. If they were coming here to brag then it wasn't something I wanted to look at. I could however not let go of the fact that Misaki didn't know something. She knew almost everything. Ryuu wasn't really impressed and didn't seemed to even care about our senpais coming our way.

"What is it, Misaki-chan...?" Misaki finally found what she was searching for in her mind.

"Only a few students have been able to jump over a few years, Hitsugaya Toshiro, Izumaru Gin and Shiba Kaien. They are most known for it. They were students with talents beyond our own. It's like adding all of our three talents together. They are and were considered geniuses... and well... he's a genius.." Now did it seem like Ryuu got an interest in the guy. He didn't really look interested but he probably wanted to know why Misaki knew so much about that guy. To be honest I wanted to know why too.

"What's his name?" I didn't think it was Ryuu's meaning to say it in a hateful way but because I knew him so well I noticed how his eyes narrowed. He was jealous. His forest green eyes became almost black. In one way it suited him. His light brown skin color, the black eyes and his almost white hair. It made beautiful contrast. I think Misaki saw that too. She smiled a bit but then she saw the way he felt.

"Según Kaito or his full name Según Mhil Kaito."

"Why do you remember a complicated name like that? I can't even pronounce it. I never heard a name like that before..." I think Ryuu felt little better now. Knowing that he had... an unusual and probably in Ryuus eyes a pretty lame name.

"That's why I remembered it. Why are you so mad for all of sudden?"  
"I'm not mad." I sighed and shook my head. I leered at the last year students and then I noticed that the one and only guy we just were talking about stood behind me. He didn't just stood behind me. In the same second he had laid a hand on my shoulder as if he wanted my attention. I was chocked. I didn't sense any spiritual pressure from him. Was that even possible? Did this... Según Mhil Kaito even have powers to become a Death God? Did he have a power I couldn't sense? He must had heard what Misaki and Ryuu talked about but yet... he gave me such a friendly smile.

"You must be Tamako Ayame, nice to meet you in person." Everyone was was watching him and he decided to look at... me? It was almost amusing. He didn't only look at me, he talked to me too. Why did I always get into this position? The Soul King did really hate me with all his heart.  
"You... know who I'm?" Almost all excitement I felt died. What a stupid question I just said. Just like that. I would now hear the whole story about how I and Kei looked so alike. I looked down at the ground and closed my eyes. Damit. For the first time in my life didn't I want to think about him. I would cry again and I did already look... sad.

"Of course I do. Your spiritual pressure almost broke the barrier during your entrance exam." He didn't mention Kei? This must been the first time anything like this happened. The first time that I got first to be myself, not a little sister. I listened careful to his words. Did he say that I almost broke the barrier that was protecting the barrack? That was impossible. It had to be. This had to be a joke. I had to look around but no one seemed to be laughing. Everyone just seemed to be starring and well who wouldn't? If Misaki knew who this person was and said he was a genius... I could with no problems at all calculate that this guy was popular. Popular by his looks, personality and his talent.  
"I... did?" Según Mhil Kaito was like no one I met before... no one if you didn't think about _him_. _He_ was out of anyones league.

"My class got to do the barrier spells. You made the group that held yours faint. It was funny to see." I had made someone faint, or rather, a whole group? I fainted and it was humiliating. I wondered how the last years felt about it. I didn't have to think about it to understand it. I was probably hated. I was hated before my first day even started.

"Thank you... I think?" I took a step back to let him now that I didn't really want to have girls that liked him on my back and that he could step out of this talk if he wanted to. I knew how fangirls were acting. I knew how boys that were like him acted. I didn't want any problem. In the same way I wanted to just forget about them. He seemed to be a nice guy. Maybe he was different? Maybe he wasn't after something? Had no intentions in hurting others to gain power? He looked really good too. I had to give him a chance. I had to give myself a chance. I wasn't easy to come along with.

"Call me Kaito." I was probably hated by more then I could believe. Why would he offer me to say his first name? Did he do this to every girl he met? If it was so then I was safe. I wasn't really the one to use rankings bur this time I had to offer him the title.

"I-I can't do... that... you're like... a senpai... I don't even know you." He seemed a bit.. disappointed? He looked down a bit and saw the necklace hanging around my neck. The smile came back just like that. He took up a necklace that he had under his shirt. It was an identical necklace but was a dark violet crystal.

"Everyone start out as strangers but after a while you realize maybe how much you have in common."


	11. Chapter 11

_**Chapter 11**_

I did... somehow... understand what he meant by that. The first time you met someone you didn't know anything about them. Not really. All you could have heard was rumors and they was not always true. By meeting the person face to face, it gave you an opportunity to think whatever you felt about the person. You had to give someone a chance and... when I looked at him I felt that I too should give him that chance. I remembered what Konno-sensei had said, to not open up to much in the beginning. This was different. He wasn't in the same class as me. We didn't compete for a better rank. He was already a genius, he didn't need to fight me and I didn't need to fight him. There was no motive at all. I was so naive. Why did I think that everyone was evil or had a secret reason? He wasn't a part of Squad 6. I couldn't stop living. I couldn't stop having faith in others – just like the promise I made to my brother.

But where did Kaito get that necklace? It had to be the same maker that made the one that I was wearing. I stopped myself in my thoughts. I needed to slow down. Why did it even matter that he had the same necklace as I had? It only meant that someone that trusted Kei also trusted this Sengún Mhil Kaito. It was more necklaces then only one.

"Where did you get that necklace?" That was probably one of those most random question you could ask someone. Kaito looked down at his necklace and held it out so that I could touch it. I reached out my hand and felt the cold crystal against my skin. It really matched him, the dark violet crystal. I didn't realize how close I stood and when I did I let it go at the same moment.  
"A friend gave it to me when I started at the Academy. Where did you get yours?" Yes, they had the same friend. It had to be. It was such an unique necklace. I sighed and smiled. I could relax now.  
"It's a long story and it's kind of hard to explain." It was the typical line to try to get someone to mind there own business. I however didn't mean it like that. It was a long story. I had to talk about... many things. Things that I saw unfit to even write on an entrance exam. One day, maybe.

"We have all the time in the world but... we have to go now." We? Did he want to join us at the entrance ceremony? I had almost forgotten Misaki and Ryuu. The other last year students had passed us and walked into the Academy. I hadn't even heard the gates were they going to do? Then I saw something that I should had felt much earlier. The lieutenants were there, in the back of the crowd of last year students. The same lieutenants that I met during the exam. Renji Abarai and Izuru Kira. Why were they here? I understood why the lieutenant of squad 3 was here, if he was a teacher he maybe wanted to introduce himself better. The other one... he who had his hair styled like a pineapple, why was he here? Hadn't the lieutenant of squad 6 better things to do? It was like he heard what I thought.

"What are you punks looking at? Come with us!" I was so surprised. Was this the entrance ceremony? Inside the gates I could see that they had taken away the barracks and made like a dueling arena. I turned at Misaki and Ryuu. Misaki looked at me with sparkling eyes and Ryuu were about to laugh his chest out. I had never really showed an interest in guys and now when I did? They knew as soon as they heard me talk. I gave them a meaning look. Kaito was the one to laugh first. He wasn't stupid. He knew what they thought and when he didn't even say anything against it... did he show an interest in me? As a girl? I didn't know if I liked I or not. I had only had one person set in my mind for 5 years. A part of me wished him to be here. Awkward. Kaito turned around towards the lieutenant of Squad 6.

"You seem nervous, Abarai-fukutaichou. What's wrong?" Kaito had that voice that was so polite but had that humorous hidden string. Was... was a last year student mocking a lieutenant?! I heard it was a friendly gesture.

"Shut up and bring your ass over here!" I heard Konno-senseis voice in my head. _Stay away from Squad 6._ Did he mean that the lieutenant was dangerous? He had said that strange line to me when he heard my name. _I wonder how long it would take for you to show up_. It made sense. I grabbed Kaitos shirt as if my hand protected him.

"I'm sorry, Ayame-chan but it seems that duty calls. I hope I don't humiliate myself to much." Humiliate himself? What were he going to do? Kaito looked at Misaki and Ryuu and nodded to them. "I don't want to seem rude, friends of Ayame. We have to have a proper introduction later." Kaito took a step back and looked down at my hand that was holding him back. He smiled at me. That kind carrying smile. His warm hand took mine and made me let go. With just a move he disappeared right in front of my eyes.

"That was..." I didn't even know how to describe the situation. What kind of situation was it?  
"That was Hohō! Or on our more common tongue, an agility step method! No... it was to fast.. it had to be Shunpo. A move that's very hard to master and not only that... He knew who you were! He's like.. that's like..." I had no idea what she just talked about. I had read a bit about methods that were famous fighting styles. I hadn't come to read about the more harder techniques yet.

"He thought you were hot and wasn't afraid to say it." I felt my cheeks become red. Why did Ryuu have to put it out like that?! I had to come with some kind of defensive.  
"He didn't say I was... He just wanted to be nice! If everyone was straight forward with what they thought of each other maybe they would have come a bit further in their own relationship!" I saw Ryuus cheeks become a bit red too. He knew that I meant him and Misaki. Served him right. We walked into the Academy and tried to get the best view as possible. We found a place in the first raw at the conner. It wasn't the best viewer seat but we couldn't leave Misaki just because we wanted to see everything that happened on the ceremony. Someone had to take the bad spot.

"I would however say that he looked at you like he have known you for ages. You maybe have an admirer." Misaki started to laugh and I joke hit her on the shoulder.

"I would never.. I... please stop it. I still can't... you know... forget _him._ " Oh now. I shouldn't have meantion him. I knew what I was going to hear from them now. I got mentally ready for the usual wake-up call. Ryuu saw it as an opportunity to give back on what I just said to him.

"Please stop talk about your hero or whatever savior-thing you have. You only going to hurt yourself with your fantasy and you know it."

"Ryuu is right, Ayame. I did a research on this.." Misaki didn't have time to finish what she was going to say. A loud bell rang and the eco made everyone in the audience silent. In the middle of this kind of arena stood three figures. Izuru Kira, Abarai Renji and... Kaito? Where the hell did he stand in the middle as if he belonged besides them?! Okay, he did belong to them. He had exactly the same aura as they had but it felt weird someone that was in the center of attention just have given you his attention.

"Welcome, punks, to the Spiritual Arts Academy! By now you know our names so let's not keep this too long. Today we're going to show you what awaits you inside this school. If you study hard, you maybe will be able to do something usefull for the society. Watch and learn. After this fight will we call up your names and to which class and so on." I thought the ceremony would be something great, like a long speach that would explain that you always should have your mind open.. or something more poetic. I had heard that a few Captains had betrayed the Gotei 13 and that one of them was a former teacher at this school. It maybe was his thing to talk with that kind of words. The lieutenant of Squad 6 really did use the word 'punks' much. Everyone had their favorite word. He started to move at the other end of the arena and Kaito started to walk toward our end. He seemed so focus. His purple eyes looked right through the air as if he was speculating what kind of moves his opponent would use. What...

"I know what's going to happen."Ryuu looked towards Kaito and I turned around at him to see if I could tell what he knew by his facial expression and, yes, I could. It was a reason why Kaito had a real weapon on. It was because he was going to use it. He would fight a lieutenant with a real sword. This was insane. This was...

"Let me present: Abarai Renji versus Según Mhil Kaito!"


	12. Chapter 12

_**Chapter 12**_

Kaito was going to fight a lieutenant?! Was this some kind of joke? He would die trying. I knew that Misaki had said that he was a genius but this was a different class. No one could take experience not even if you had that kind of talent. It was like trying to catch the moon by jumping down in the water at it's reflection. It was like chasing a monkey that didn't want to be caught. Completely... stupid! How could Kaito accept a challenge like this?

I knew that he didn't anything to lose. In this fight no one had anything to lose. This was just about giving the students something to look forward to. Giving them a goal that themselves would know was possible to do. I regret one of my thoughts. There was only one person that did lose something in this fight and that was the lieutenant. If Kaito were to win then he could say hello to a seat as an lieutenant... but had he powers like that? I hated that I couldn't feel his spiritual pressure. It made it difficult to say what he was going to do. I just had to read his movement instead.

"This is going to be a good fight. I have heard that Según-senpai almost won last time but then the lieutenant used his Bankai. If the lieutenant hadn't had that kind of move then..." Then Kaito would have won? I looked out by the rest of the audience. I didn't hear who said it but something told me that it was probably one of Kaitos classmates. I looked back at Kaito and the lieutenant. They hadn't started yet. I saw Kaito leer back at me and smiled for a short while. His eyes showed the strength he possessed. There was something with his eyes that included something that I couldn't understand. That if it held a secret knowledge. Was that one of the reasons that I couldn't feel his reiatsu? He.. he maybe didn't want me to feel it. Could you push away the spiritual energy that much?

"Don't look so scared, Ayame-chan. Just wish me luck." With those words, Kaito started the fight. He did that Shunpo move that Misaki had said earlier. Faster then the blink of an eye they stood right before each other. I couldn't hear what hey said to each other but by the smile on their faces the challenged each other. They had waited for this moment to see who was the better warrior. Their swords met. They used techniques that looked natural to use but I knew it must been a struggle to make that a natural reflex. Like they were dancing... like it was an art. I stared paralyzed at them. After a while they jumped away from each other. Kaito put his hand on the inside of his other elbow. That stand was...

"Way of destruction, No. 31, Red Flame Cannon!" It was remarkable to have a concentration to make it straight for the target... but he was a genius. I had to get used to that. That... that cannon was going to hit the lieutenant. This was going to hurt. I heard someone call out a name. A name that I waited to hear for myself. I couldn't miss this.

"Howl, Zabimaru!" The sand from the ground got caught in the wind. Whirlwinds circulated the lieutenant and when it got down I saw the new form of his sword. I had never seen someone take out a Shikai before. It looked like teeth that waited to take its prey. The lieutenants weapon cut through the attack. I understood now what this fight was about. They used harder and harder moves but always went down to the basics. How was Kaito going to top this? And after that? If the one in the audience spoke the truth then this Abarai Renji had a Bankai. They had to have some rules at the Gotei 13 about using that power. The fight went on for minutes and it was a close fight. They used different kinds of fighting styles. Kaito hadn't showed his Shika yet but by the look of the state he was in he was going to use it soon. The lieutenant attacked. It looked like a final blow. Just in that moment - he used it.

"Blackout, Zetsumei." He... he did it. He blocked the lieutenants attack but it wasn't as I thought. As soon as the blade touched Abarai Renjis shikai his eyes became black. What... what happened? A wind of dust came over us. It was almost impossible to see through. Then I saw something I didn't thought many saw. The katana he had in the beginning turned into a short black glaive with jewel details in the colors of white, grey and purple. It was a beautiful weapon even if I couldn't see it clear. One thing I think only I saw was that Kaito had two swords in his hands. A black and a golden one. It was small like a dagger and had the same detail work as the short black glaive.

Did he have two Zanpakutō? Was that even possible? I had heard about the two Captains with 'twin Zanpakutō' but that was rare if not the only pair that existed. Was it possible that a new one had been created?

I knew it was impossible. As soon as the connection between the weapons disappeared the gold dagger disappeared. That was an ability that could take anyone by suprise. It looked like Kaito just took a misstep but I saw it all. Kaito could have made his move, if he had jumped up then he would have had a clear strike. He didn't take it. He didn't want to take it. He didn't want the other students to study his abilities. Abarai Renji didn't hesitate. He put his blade under his chin. They jumped from each other and after a while did the dust fall to the ground.

"Abarai Renji wins!" That was wrong. It was just a split of a second but I saw it. The lieutenant laughed and walked towards Kaito. He didn't even seem to have noticed it. He took his hand out and helped the last year student up on his feet. Did Kaito want the lieutenant to win? I stared at the both of them. This had to be planned.  
"You're quite something. I guess you are near to achieve Bankai." Kaito just laughed and shook his head. He took away his Shikai and put the katana back. The lieutenant did the same.  
"I'm sorry, Abarai-fukutaichou. Not yet."

"I hope no squad has promised you a seat yet. We need people like you in our squad. If my Captain would see you he wouldn't wait to give you a position." Everything in my body screamed. If my thoughts were right that this lieutenant was suspicious then I couldn't let him take in Kaito under his wings. Kaito was... could be my friend. I opened my mouth to say something but then I realized that they didn't talk to me. I was just eavesdropping. I hated people that digged into other peoples business and now... I did the same! I had to take in vain that he knew better than to accept it.

"I think you have too high hopes for me. I'm just here to be able to protect the ones in need and those I want to protect." He had same thought about being a Death God as I had. I sighed with relief and smiled. Kaito walked over to our little group but when he did that everyone tried to be the one he was walking to. Ryuu took Misaki in one hand and me in the other and walked away from the chaos. Kaito relized what happened and nodded shortly. His purple eyes looked so happy, as if he had seen something he treasured but when he relized it that fire died a bit. He knew that he couldn't talk to us at the moment. There were others that needed to talk to him. Needed or needed, more like wanted. I wanted to talk to him too. I wanted to ask him, wanted to know his story. There was something about him but I couldn't put my finger on it. I readed his lips. "See you later, Ayame."

The lieutenant of Squad 3 started to call at everyone to get their attention. Not many listened to what he had to say but after this fight I wondered how anyone could really stand still or listen. The fight was something you could talk weeks about. About the fighting style, the movements, the blades, the attack and so on. The blades made me the most interest. Not to be mean but the blond man wasn't someone that you had... that kind of respect to. He seemed so scared. Scared that he would do something. Ryuu, Misaki and I was however silent. This was not the oppertunity to talk. We could be amazed when we knew that everything was fine. We waited the results and Ryuu gave a few students the cold eye. I was so used to the way Ryuu acted that I hadn't realized how terrifying he could be if he only wanted to.

"If I can get everyones attention! Now were going to call up the first class!" It were happening. Right before my eyes. I heard that the first year student became silent and listened with all their might. I hoped with everything in my heart that I would come to the first class. I really wanted to be able to say that I had the same talent as my brother had. He was in the first class. He was, not like Kaito, but good. I felt my heart break a bit. He maybe still were.

"With no special order at all...  
Shiro Ryuu  
Tamako Ayame,"

I heard my name. I heard Ryuu's name. The only one that was missing now was Misaki. I could count that about ten students were attending the first class. I listened and to my suprise... when Izuru Kira was done he hadn't said Misakis name. Misaki wasn't on the list. Misaki... what?! How was this even possible?! She was the most talented of us. We asked her when we didn't know something nad now? How could our group be splitted up? This was impossible. It had to be impossible. I had to do something. It had to be some kind of mistake. I looked at Misaki but she didn't seem to be suprised at all. It was like she waited for her doom. Tears began to burn behind my eyelids. She wanted to make a mark but instead she had left her position all open. I hugged her hard and I felt Ryuus arms around us.

"I'm going to talk to someone. I'm going to make us go in the same class like we were meant to be." I could try to go to the Captain of Squad 6. I knew that it was rude to ask but... _he_ maybe had that influense that was needed. _He_ could do anything but I wasn't sure _he_ would do something like that for me.  
"No, Ayame. Don't get on someones bad side just becuase of me. You're a fool if you do it. We weren't meant to go in the same class. I knew that I wasn't capable to make it to the top but I knew you were, both of you." She looked at both of us and she smiled. I knew that was a fake smile. She was broken inside. The ice blue shimmer she always had in her eyes were gone.

"Misaki, listen to me. You're a hardworker. If someone can do it's you. Do your best and they maybe upgrade you to the first class. Prove them wrong. Promise me you wont give up becuase of this." Ryuu sounded so hurt. I had never seen him so vulnerable. I knew that this wasn't the end of the world but it felt like if one of us were apart then it was just a matter of time before everyone of us were left all alone.

"I promise, but you have to go now. We will see each other again."


	13. Chapter 13

_**Chapter 13**_

The longer I thought about it, the less sense did it make. The first class, Class 1? There had to be something wrong. I couldn't possibly had ranked that high. I had lost control over my reiatsu during the exam and left the sheet almost empty... not like Misaki but almost. I lost control like Ryuu did when he started a fight with the judge. I wasn't worth being here. Misaki was. This wasn't fair, not at all. Ryuu and I had, against our will walked together with the rest of the Class 1 students to our classroom. I looked behind me and saw Misaki stand there, all alone. Okay, she wasn't alone. I knew that if any of us were left alone she would be the one who made it best considering the situation. Ryuu and I would had done something stupid if it was one of us. She was easy to like if you compared it with me and Ryuu too. Ryuu was rude and I was.. I didn't even know how to explain myself. Complicated. We walked into the school and through corridors. Even if it was a big school the corridors was more narrow then they needed to be. The other students walked their happy-walk or talked about how good they were. I could bet that Misaki were better then them. Why did she leave her exam blank?! She had to prove everyone wrong.

Ryuu and I walked behind the other students and the only two spots left in the room was the ones in the corner. Just this classroom was small but I knew that it existed classrooms that could fill hundreds of students. We got to our new seats and looked at the teacher that was already standing in the front. On the blackboard stood it with big white letters: Gengorō Ōnabara. I supposed that was the name of that tall man before us. To be true, he was huge. He looked so motivated and slammed his fits in the table before him. He had dark tone in his skin, glasses and when I looked up at him is bald skull shined.

"I have been the teacher for Class 1 for decades. I have had students like the three active lieutenants Hinamori Momo, Izuru Kira and Abarai Renji. I want to make you as successful as them! Talents like theirs maybe exist in this room right now but talent get you no were if you aren't prepared to fight. You need to fight for it. You succeeded to enter the Academy but the road before you will be hard. The Academy believes in you and..." I really tried to take in and hear what he had to say but I couldn't focus. In the line before me sat two irritating girls that laughed at something. It wasn't really a laughter but more like a giggle. How could you giggle during a speech? This was suppose to be the lines you heard in your head when you didn't do good enough at a test! These were the lines that you had to remember to push yourself to the limit! Instead I heard giggles. I stared at their backs. Their unrealistic red locks falled down to their shoulders. Something told me that they were related. I couldn't help but try listening to what they had to say.

"Did you see that upperclassmen that fought the lieutenant? He was so hot!" I hated myself for agreeing with them in my head. He was cool and... yes, hot. When someone said hot I could only think of one person that, almost, invented that word. It was like if _he_ was the defenition of the word. I wondered where that Captain could be right now.

"Yeah, I know! His eyes were like jewels and his body. Oh, I wonder what hides under that shirt of his!" I wasn't the only one that thought it was wierd having a white shirt under the uniform. I hadn't however thought about it in that way! This was a subject that really didn't fit in a classroom. Couldn't they talk about it some other time?  
"His blade was so cool! I wish that my Shikai will have a form like that!" I wanted to hit myself in the face. Was that more important then our mentors speech? Maybe it was more interesting but... I felt Ryuu hit me on the shoulder. I could her his voice in my ear whispering.

"You're not listening." I nodded in an apology. I had to focus even if the fangirls made my mind boil right now. I took a deep breath. I looked down at my hands and studied my nails.

"A new thing for this year is that you will, each and everyone of you, get a mentor from one of the upper classes. They have volunteered to help you out but if they see you unfit for the opportunity it will be taken away. With unfit I mean if you break the rules." I looked up. Kaito. Were it possible that I could get him? Was he a person that nominated himself to stuff like that? I heard the two fangirls gasp for air. Yes, I wasn't the only one that thought that. I gave up on that little plan and instead thought about the fight the two redheaded would have. Fighting over the same guy, how annoying. If Misaki and I would had fallen for the same guy I would gladly give him over to her. It wasn't like I could give a person to her but I wouldn't have the same fighting spirit.

"I will give you groups that you will be working in, group of three." Ryuu, Misaki and I. That was the first thing that came up in my mind but I soon realized that wasn't going to happen. Ryuu and I maybe but there would come a new part. What if I were left alone? I looked at Ryuu. He grabbed my hand to give me some comfort. It didn't help much as I realized we both were out of our comfort zone when Misaki wasn't here. If we happened to get into the same group, then it almost had to be a calm person that had the heart at the right place. If not this would be a loud group that couldn't get anything done.

"The group will bring the best qualities out of you. Don't try changing the groups. After you have been given a group you will have some spare time. I suggest you get to your dorms and trying to get comfortable. First day of school starts tomorrow." Ōnabara-sensei started to call names from the name list and told then which group they would join. I had no idea how they managed to make these kinds of groups. They had to know us to be able to do that... maybe they had been watching over us the last few hours? But was that enough to make groups? When I heard my name I couldn't help but feel joy. I thanked the Soul King even if he were a pain in the ass today. Ryuu and I got into the same group but there were also another one.

I got up from the chair to go to the person that was a part of our group. The last part of the group was to my relief not one of the two girls that was giggling. I couldn't see if he or she was a man or a woman. The student had big eyes, dark skinn and black hair. All I could think of when I saw the student was the big smile.

"Hi, my name's Yūshirō Shihinō. Nice to meet you!" Ryuu and I just stared at this new boy as if he had done something wrong. He noticed the way we were looking at him and his smile turned down into an awkward smile. He acted like Misaki would had done. He bowed before us and looked up again. What a polite child. Bowing and everything. Then I noticed his last name. He was in one of the four noble families. I hadn't thought about it but Class 1 had often students from rich families. I couldn't help but smile at him becuase when I looked at him I could see Misaki. I knew that he couldn't take Misakis place but that didn't mean that he wouldn't be nice. Misaki had even said to me that she didn't want me to make a fool of myself and for her, I would do anything.

"My name's Tamako Ayame and this is Shiro Ryuu. Nice to meet you."


	14. Chapter 14

_**Chapter 14**_

 _His words still ached inside me. Burned like warm iron that touched my flesh. Boiled like my blood were a thermal spring. The words of the man almost everyone trusted. I thought it would be the best moment of my life and somehow, it still was. It was like looking death right in the eyes and not being defeated. It was like be given something that no one that ever lived had seen. A duty. A meaning. A fate. Months had passed sense the first and last time I saw him... and yet... I could hear the same words as if he said it just seconds ago. The words that made me understand that my daughters destiny would be greater then anything I knew but also the loneliest. She would be all alone in the world and no one would be able to stand by her side. Even if someone wanted to be with her no one ever could. They all would die and she couldn't live with knowing that. She would stand alone. I knew my daughter. Even if I hadn't met her.  
_

 _"You will carry a girl that will be extraordinary. She will be the one." The one for what? I didn't know the details. All I knew that he wanted her. I couldn't ask why. It wasn't my place to ask as she wasn't mine to keep. All I knew was when she came to the world I couldn't be there to support her. That was what he wanted from me. I knew that this child would take my life as the start of hers but... I still wanted her with all my heart. I loved her more then life itself and he needed me to. That was why he had chosen me. He wanted me to have an undying love for someone I never really known. A love for someone that would take my life. Now was the time. The time he had been waiting for. Her birth._

 _It was a pain I had never felt before. Like knifes stabbed me over and over. I screamed. My son looked at me with his light brown eyes as he squeezed my hand. Only ten years old and he would lost his mother. The pain in his eyes was almost unbearable to look at. I had said to him that I didn't want him to be next to me when I was giving birth but he was stubborn. It was if he felt the same pain as I did and in one way I thought he did. He was the same as me. Kei, my wonderful son. He looked down at the creature that was arriving. A new scream flew through the air. She was here. Finally._

" _It's a girl, Ayaka." My best friend had her in his arms and wrapped her inside a towel. He reached her out so that I could take her... but I couldn't. I couldn't hold her life in my hands. I couldn't when she absorbed my spirit. When Kei saw that I didn't do anything he took her instead. I had told him that we wouldn't keep her. He knew that there where someone that needed her more then we did.. but the look on his face. It looked like he had found the meaning of life. A duty only he could do. A fate that was strong as the bloodline they shared._

" _What will you name her?" Kei knew that she wasn't ours to name. I couldn't let him go through with it. It would break him. I looked at my best friend. He had his eyes closed. His wonderful bluish purple eyes. This pained him more then me but in some way, it felt like if he had emotions I could just do my duty. He didn't really fit to be in here and absolutely not deliver a child. He wore his usual shinigami clothes with the lieutenant badge and the kenseikan on the left side in his black hair. We had just been together with his wife and her son when this happened. Laying in here to die in their mansion wasn't really what I planned._

" _No, Kei. Give her back to Sōjun."  
"If you won't name her... then I will! Her name will be Ayame! A flower name just like yours." Kei had planned that for long. He knew and yet.. yet he did it. My heart broke into pieces. No emotions. I couldn't cry. I couldn't leave Kei all alone in this world seeing his own mother crying before dying. He was the one whos world falled apart. I left him all alone. I knew that ___Sōjun would care for him like a son when I was gone... but as well as I knew that I also knew that Kei would go his own way. Trying to do the best on his own.__

 _"No, Kei. Please don't name her."  
"Why not?" He knew why. Did I have to say it out loud?  
"We can't be attached to her it will only make it harder to let go." Sōjun knew about the situation that I had been given. He knew that there were nothing we could do about it. This was greater then any of us and he were in a high position. He choked. He and his bad health. Kei didn't stop the argue there.  
"She's my little sister! I have waited so long and... I promised that I would do everything for her!" I hated when he did promises that he couldn't keep. He was like his father in that way. Promised to come back but never returned... not alive._

 _"You don't understand. You can't do anything." I saw something inside him change. He held her closer to him. In that moment I knew that he had dedicated his life to her. He lived for her and her only. He would die for her. He would kill for her. He would do anything as long as she was safe. His eyes showed that determination. Why?  
"I promised! I won't let her down the first day in this world! I will become the greatest Death God of all time and protect her from what ever evil awaits! Sōjun-san, please, can't you teach me how to become a great Death God?" He looked at my son and I saw what he saw. Kei had spiritual pressure and had all the willpower that was needed. Kei was capable... but not yet. His emotions were to deep. He didn't listen to reason and followed only his own heart. He was to young.  
"You're to young to start your training and I'm afraid that my health isn't the greatest. You maybe will be able to start training when my son is done with his studies. He will become a great Death God... impulsive but great. He can train you better then I ever could."_

" _You see! Oka-sama. We can do this! I can beat every hollow and..." Did Kei think that the hollows where behind this? That they were the enemy? This was a matter that extended the normally light and dark side. It was a grey matter. This was something that could start a civil war if it wasn't handle the right way.  
_

" _The hollows are not your enemy in this matter. I know I don't speak much... about your father but... he always said this: Your enemies enemy is your friend." My voice started to become weak. It was almost time for me to move to the other world... what ever life waited after Soul Society. Kei walked closer to me. His blond hair... I wondered if Ayame would have the same color of her hair. I wondered if she would have his light brown eyes. I wondered... if Ayame would have the same beauty, talent and compassion. Ayame... it was a wonderful name. It was the perfect name for her. I looked at the child in Keis arms. Yes, she was beautiful. No wonder she was the chosen one.  
_

" _Then who is the enemy, Oka-sama?"  
"I can't tell you. Only time will tell."_


	15. Chapter 15

_**Chapter 15**_

The first night at the dormitory. I thought it would be wonderful but it wasn't. It was one of the worst nightmares I had ever had. I woke up gasping for air and with a headache. In panic I grabbed my head and stared down at the white mattress. This... this was. Tears began to fall down from my eyes and when I wouldn't do it in completely silence, it woke up Misaki. After we had met our new teammate, Ryuu and I had to show him to Misaki. Misaki had also been placed in a group but they didn't want to met us. Yūshirō didn't really have a chose and as the nice and polite person he was he agreed even if I saw that he felt a bit uncomfortable. We met at the dormitory, where the boys dorm was to the left and the girls to the right. It had later shown that in the dormitory I would sleep in the same room as Misaki. Right now, I thanked the Soul King for doing that. I wouldn't be able to bear trouble someone else then her.

"What happened, Ayame?" She walked over to my side of the room and sat down beside me with a protecting arm around me. Yes, what had happened? I closed my eyes and without even trying to remember the dream everything came back like to was a movie on replay. A woman giving birth to a child that was destined for great things or a man, that almost everyone trusted, claimed her to be. A young boy, the son of the mother that stood by her side trying to give his sister an opportunity to a family and then there were the last man. A man that was the best friend of the mother and seemed to be a nobleman. It was... It had to be. The names made it very clear. That was a fragment of my past. But why just this scene? I wanted to have clues about Keis mystery but was it in my own past? Was this my brains way to show me that I knew more then I thought I did?

"I saw my mother... she was about to give birth to me and Kei... he was by her side. They talked about giving me away because someone saying that I was chosen for some kind of duty. Kei said... that he would protect me. Another man was there... he was a Death God wearing a _kenseikan_." I didn't even know if my telling made any sense. Nothing made any sense. My head was a mess. This was however something Misaki was good at. She could connect things to each other much better then I could. She looked like she understood the nightmare.

"Wait, you had a vision? About your mother? Ayaka, if I remember her name right?" Was it a vision? I didn't even know the right term for my newest experience. I nodded. Yes, it was her. I was in her thoughts or more like it felt like I was her. I felt her fear and pain as if it was my own. It felt so real. If I didn't know better I could have thought that it was me in some kind of twisted way. She had a inner fight with herself just like I have. Her thoughts was all about the child inside her... Me. They were so complicated. Misaki continued. "And you saw Kei too? What was the name of the other man?" What was his name? I closed my eyes and tried to say the name out loud.

"Sōjun." I looked up and Misaki looked at me as if she had seen a ghost. She was all pale in her face. She had heard about that man. I just made her thoughts about the subject clearer. If someone knew about people doing something for the Gotei 13 it was her. She had read so much. I felt something inside me got taken up to the surface. If she knew the man then it meant that I could ask that person about that dream. I could ask him if this was a true memory or just something that my mind had made up.  
"Do you.. we can ask..." Misaki knew were I was going in my thoughts. She had thought the same thing but something by her facial expression told me that this man was no longer able to give answers.

"Did this man tell you about something else? A fact that leads us to another person?" I nodded again. Yes, when Kei asked for this man to train him himself he had said that Kei wasn't ready yet but when he was ready his son would be the suitable teacher.

"He had a son." Misaki got up from my bed. She stood right in the middle of the room. Her thoughts was probably in the same trouble as mine but Misaki was whoever used to that. She liked to think and understand abstract things. I hadn't that ability. She looked straight at me. She had all the connections she needed to make a statement. I saw a smile of success on her face.

"Everything fits if you think about it. Kei was the former 3th seat of Squad 6, right? Only one man named Sōjun wearing a _kenseikan_ in that time exsist. His full name was Kuchiki Sōjun and his son is Kuchiki Byakuya, the 28th head of the Kuchiki clan, the Captain of Squad 6." I was gone. How could she get all that to fit together? It sounded so realistic too, sounded logical. My heart skipped a beat when she said _his_ name. Did... did she say that my fantasy of having a future with a connection to my savior existed? That it wasn't just a fairytail? I could talk to _him_ about this. _He_ wasn't there during the scene but his father maybe told _him_ something. Kei maybe had told _him_ something... becuase if Kei was in _his_ Squad then it meant that the Captain had accepted training Kei.

"If all of this is true then maybe the other man that told your mother that... that you would be born to a... special position is also true? Like you were the chosen one for a mission?" This was to much for me to handle. In my whole life I have lived in the shadow of my brother. I had in my believes that he was the one everything was about and that if I was more like him everything would be better. Wasn't that true? It had to be or the balance in my life would go in ruins. Everything Kei did was always for the greater good. He was the important one, not me. But.. if it was me that was more important... was it my fault that Kei was gone? Was he gone because he tried to protect me just like he promised? But from what? That was still the biggest question that Konno-sensei also had asked. If Konno-sensei were right in his theory that Kei was alive then what did he hide from or who held him in hostage? I couldn't take upon myself the be responsible for that.

"I'm nothing special. It had to be just an old man with an insane mind. We.. have to speak to the Captain and also Konno-sensei when he gets back from his trip with his friend. If they know that we know this we maybe able to help each other... we maybe will be able to know the truth about Kei." Misaki looked at me. She knew something more that I didn't know.

"I know more about my father then you think. I know how he thinks. He said that you are in danger, right? Even if your brother is the most important person in this matter you are somehow an important factor. My father is on that trip together with the Captain, the Captain is the friend he meant." She took a short break to breath.

"Also, by saying that you are in danger it only means that he wants you to know that you have to become strong. It will take some time before them come back so when they come back we have to prove to them that we're ready for whatever problem it could be. We have to show them that we won't be a burden if they let us tag along. We will train to become a genius like Kaito Mhil Según, so that we all can protect each other. We have to tell Ryuu about this. He will step up his training too."

"We have nothing to lose with this... right?  
"Well, my Queen. That's something we only will know when were done."


	16. Chapter 16

_**Chapter 16**_

"You're too complicated for your own good." I frowned at Ryuu as he sat beside me while our instructor talked about different fighting styles. This day had been full of new things. We had learned more about Kido and what you had to think about before you use it. It was really interesting to listen to but we hadn't began to really do Kidō on our own. They probably wanted us to know the basics first. That was probably the wisest. What we however was allowed to do was practice how to use Hohō. To my surprise I was quite good at it and when our instructors told us how to do it I even got some compliments. No one had ever said to me that I was good. The one who really made an impression was Yūshirō but all he said when someone said that he was good was that his sister was better. I wasn't the only one with a sibling complex.

This was the last lesson of the day. I had waited until the right moment to tell Ryuu about it. That moment was the break between our lunch and last lesson. I didn't know if I wanted to trouble Yūshirō with this but when I said that it would only be a burden for him, he insisted. This wasn't really the reaction about this I prepared myself for but I never really knew what could come out from Ryuu. We sat in one of the larger barracks within the area of the Academy. It was one of the fighting rooms were students often challenged each other into duels. We sat on the floor in the back of the whole class to be able to talk without disrupt the lesson to much.

"Misaki's right. If this vision is true then we have to get prepared but... what the hell that you are chosen to something?! What have you done to get a destiny?" I had told him about everything but that in detail because I wasn't really sure myself. What had I done to get into this? Being born would be the only way to describe it. I hadn't done anything good so it had to be my mothers doing. I wondered what kind of woman she was. I wondered what she had done to get some mystics attention. Kei always said that she was the greatest person he knew and that she was his rolemodel. If he said that then I believed that whatever my mother had done it was nothing bad. If that was so... could that mean that this chosen thing was something good? That this destiny of mine could be a blessing? It didn't really feel like it. What if I didn't want to be a part of it? What if it was something that involved being something that I wasn't? When Konno-sensei said that I should stay away from Squad 6 and that I wasn't safe outside the walls I really took this destiny-thing as a curse. Nothing else about me was interesting so it had to be that factor that made be in danger.

"And you're rude." I mumbled hoping that Ryuu didn't hear me but I knew he did. I knew that he wasn't serious about his comment, he never was but sometimes I couldn't help but wonder. I knew that my dream probably was very farfetched but I had to know. Was this my past? I wanted to know... know more about me and about Kei. This was maybe the only way. The only way that I knew.

"She didn't ask for this... it was something she was born into." I gave Yūshirō a smile and he gave me a bright smile in return. He really did understand. I studied him for a short moment. A nobleman like him, having everything he could ask for and a future that people in his surroundings given him. The difference between us was mostly that for him it walked down for generations. For me it probably was randomly or nothing at all. I hoped for the last one.

"I don't think anyone of you should have something to say in this matter. By the looks of it seems that both of you have a pretty secure future." This made me a bit angry. Did Ryuu think that this was something I wanted to happen? That I wanted to know that I didn't have a wonderful past with beautiful flowers and hundreds of friends? Secure was totally the wrong word. The possibility that the man or woman that was involved with Kei's mystery wanted me something bad did still existed.

"Secure future? Didn't you hear the part that my mother wanted to give me away? That part when Keis death can all be a lie? I don't want any of it! I want a life like... like.." I knew no one that had have a good childhood. Misakis mother was something that no one ever talked about but because I never had met her she probably died when Misaki was young. Ryuus family left him and his grandmother gave him up for adoption because she couldn't take care of two kids. Yes, Ryuu had a cousin but I knew nothing more. Ryuu didn't really talk about his past. The restaurant saved his life. I didn't really know anything about Yūshirō yet but he was probably the ones name I should had said.

"Sorry, Ayame. I just... you should feel good. Isn't it good that Kei maybe is alive? That you had someone that said that you would become something great? Your own mother was prepare to give you up for something even greater? I don't really see the problem... you weren't left because you were a burden." I didn't know what to say. It felt like someone hit me in the face. I had no right to lay down my problems to him. I had it so much better then he had. The guilt of bringing this op spread through my body like a virus. I had nothing more to say. He was right. Yūshirō understood that Ryuu probably had a worse past and by the description he understood that Ryuu talked about himself.

"The problem is that it wasn't by her own will... just like yours. The difference between you two is that a path is chosen for her. You have all the doors open. You can take every path that you want." Our talking tone became only higher and higher. Now it was so loud that everyone in our class probably heard what we were talking about. It probably wasn't an interesting conservation if you didn't know all the details. The whole class gave us the evil eye and our instructor stared at us. He pointed with the wooden sword at us.

"I'm sorry, Ryuu..."  
"I'm sorry too."

"Group 4, have you something you want to tell the whole class?" I bite myself on the inside of the cheek. What should I say? I looked at Ryuu and he stood up already. I blinked. What did he do? Was he going to tell everyone about what we just talked about? No... Ryuu wouldn't do that. After all he was one of my best friends.

"Ayame-chan asked if we get to met our mentors soon... but if you want me to show what kind of moves you did as a proof that we can multitask..." Ryuu was the master of lies. He could come up with anything out of the blue. I had always admired that about him.  
"That's a good question, they should... oh, they're here. Well class, we stop the lesson here. The mentors were all with you during your entrance exam and after that they got to select a few possible students." Everyone in the class stood up at the same time. The upperclassmen? Were they here? I listened to the instructors story. I remembered Kaito say that he and his classmates got to do the barriers. Did... did Kaito chose me? If I was going to train hard and become a genius it would really help to have a genius teacher. I looked at the upperclassmen that walked into the classroom. I looked, searched with my eyes after Kaito. I didn't want to get my hopes up, he maybe didn't want to help a newbie out. This was just something they did to help someone in need.

He wasn't here. I looked down at the floor... well. You couldn't get everything you wanted. I looked at Yūshirō and Ryuu. Two people had come up to them and they looked like people with good grades and talent. Was it even possible to see that on a person? Then I felt something could on my chest. I looked down. I remembered not putting on my necklace this morning. I didn't use jewelry but when I did I never slept with them. My heart almost jumped out of my chest. Why didn't I feel any pressure... then I knew. I looked down. Around my neck was the identical necklace but in another color. The dark purple one. I turned around and saw Kaito right in his purple eyes. I had never thought I would be this happy to see him. Thank you, Soul King.

"You know... it looks like the necklace was designed for you. Sure the dark gold one matches you better but..." I reached for the necklace around my neck. I was just about to take it of but he took my hands before I had a chance to do it.


	17. Chapter 17

_**Chapter 17**_

He smiled in a playful way and had his head tilted on the side. I felt his hands around my wrists. His skin were in some sort of way very cold. I lowered my hands so that I could look right at him. I looked surprised at him. When I realized his gesture my cheeks got red as roses. Why did he put on his own necklace around my neck? It was his necklace... he was suppose to wear it. I couldn't wear it... I... It was like giving a ring to someone but a lighter version. The only one I could imagine giving me something was... no. I couldn't imagine _him_ giving me anything but _he_ was the only one I would accept it from. Then I realized the detail I should had focused more on. The playful smile. He was... he was just playing around. I was a foul. I looked down at the ground and he let go of my wrists. Why did I was so open for this? He changed facial expression and looked shocked. He probably didn't understand how I reacted.

"Ayame... what is it? Did... something happen?" He said it like nothing had happened at all. I took a deep breath and looked at Ryuu and Yushiro. Ryuu had hit himself in the face and started to laugh very loudly. I looked like a tomato. He understood what I thought and that Kaito just did it because... of some typical boy-reason. Naive. Boys were so naive and didn't see scenes like these as something... well... something more. You didn't sneak up behind a girl and put a necklace around her neck! It was something you did if you were involved or something. It was like stamping in my face that I was his... not that I really had a problem with that. He was my now mentor after all but... I had better things to think of then stupid emotions. That was what I told myself.

"Shut up, Ryuu... it's... I'm embarrassed that's all." Kaito realized the gesture now. He started to laugh too. He grabbed my chin and forced me to look at him. I couldn't help it. I laughed. I was so pathetic and he was so dumb to not realize it sooner.  
"I'm sorry... These are special necklaces after all and if you forgot or lost yours I just thought that... you can have mine until you found yours again." Kaito was totally a bad boy... but somehow a bad boy without realizing it. He said it like he really cared and didn't mean anything weird at all.

"I haven't lost it.. I just forgot to wear it..." The dream I had captured my attention completely so I forgot to put it on after I woke up. I could almost see it laying there beside the bed. Normaly I never forgot things like that. It was a token Kei always wore when he was inside the academy. It was meant that I should have done the smame. I frowned a bit when I thought over his use of words and continued. "Special?"

"Oh... that was why I thought you lost it. I thought you knew the story behind these necklaces." They had a story? I had never heard something about these. Was... was it becuase of that Kei always wore the necklace? He had never really told me why. They weren't famous or anything so either he made something up or was these necklaces something rare. That friend that gave Kaito and Kei their gift were still a mystery. Who was that person? I shook my head.  
"No, but please tell."

"It says that these crystals really bring what the wearer search for and value the most. The dark golden crystal stands for many things but they mostly stand for success, happiness and power. With that necklace the doors to power opens easier. The dark violet ones are more spiritual, for magic and dreams. Think that you have special dreams so says it that the crystal will make them come true." It was like the Soul King really liked me recently, it was like he brought Kaito to me just to help me. If this myth was true and if I wore this jewelry – would my dream become clearer to see? Would I get more knowledge and see it as clear as the water? I sighed. I wanted to borrow the jewelry, I really did but it wasn't right. If I walked around with his necklace... what would people think? If _he_ came back before I took it off? I didn't want anyone to get the wrong idea. I took of the necklace and gave it back to him. This was the only right thing to do.

"I will wear mine tomorrow. Thank you for your generosity but I can't borrow it." He took it back and put it around his own neck. It looked probably better there then what it did on me. It brought forward his colorful purple eyes. "Thank you for coming here to... and for being my mentor."

"Did you think that I wasn't going to show up? I almost told you the first time you saw me that I was going to be your mentor. It was almost a fight about who was going to be mentoring you and your friends. I think some even sacrificed their spare time to cleaning duty." He nodded at Ryuu, Yūshirō and their two mentors. They looked innocently at each other as if they were trying to understand what he meant by that comment. Kaito saw potential in them too. That wasn't surprising but it was a confirmation. Their hard work hadn't been for nothing and someone was even prepared to sacrifice more to mentoring them. Kaito continued. "So, what can I help you with?"

"I want to be able to graduate this school as soon as possible... or at least become as strong as I can on just a short while." Kaito looked at me and seemed really surprised about my request. That probably wasn't the first answer you gave but I was honest. I needed to become strong and I needed it now. If anyone was capable of teaching me it was him.

"What... do you have somewhere to be after school? I had somewhere to be in the same moment but the problem was that I didn't want to be in the way and that was exactly that I would be if I travelled after Konno-sensei and Captain of Squad 6.

"No, I mean... I have to become strong." I should have just stick to that. Saying that I wanted to become strong sounded good. Why didn't I only say that and don't mention the time limit? Now waited questions I really didn't want to answer. I didn't want him to be in the middle of this. I knew my friends and that they knew what was their and my responsibility. I hadn't known Yūshirō for long but by his appearance he knew what honor and duty meant. Kaito had showed that he could see past scenes that where almost obvious.

"For what?"

"Let's say that if this necklace makes dreams come true then I have to be ready." I had to be more then ready. I had to have a plan... and for now this was the only one I could think of. Kaito looked a bit sad that I hadn't said any more details.

"I will help you but I can't guarantee that you will be able to jump over a few years at the Academy because of it. I only jumped over one year. I can however guarantee that you will be better. You will learn much but you maybe won't be able to use them all. Some abilities takes time to learn completely usable. You will have to train after school everyday... are you prepared for that? It won't be easy." I had only one answer I could give him.

"I'm ready."


	18. Chapter 18

_**Chapter 18**_

 **FEW MONTHS LATER**

 _So many things happened at the Spiritual Arts school after that. Classes went on and off, homework were given to students and then back to the teachers in question. I became the TOP 1 student in the first Class with no error at all on the mid-term exam... but even then... I felt like it wasn't enough._

"You're not focusing enough." Yes. That was because I wasn't enough. I wanted to scream. That was so easy for Kaito to say. He hadn't stand like an idiot for hours everyday for the past week. I stared at Kaito as he sat on the other side of the training room, relaxing with a book in his hand. He didn't even look at me, he was all paying attention to the words in the story he read. I knew that Kaito was the only one that could help me get ready before Konno-sensei and the Captain came back but right now felt everything useless. I had been training everyday in all subjects, harder and longer then anyone. I didn't get much sleep and walking and eating in the same time became a habit. I had become better then I had ever imagined and when the weeks went by I forgot why I had been training in the first place. Now, standing there and trying to clear my mind to focus all my spiritual pressure, all thought went back up again. I had been so full of myself that I didn't even remember. I were ashamed. Right now where Konno-sensei and the Captain searching for clues about my brother and I... I were so happy about the life I had been given that I didn't look back at my old one.

I was starting to wonder if Kaito was just wasting time or if he really thought that this would help me get better. I knew how to summon my reiatsu but I didn't know what he wanted me to do with it. I mean... it looked like he didn't care. Reading was something you did on your spare time – not while you were teaching. I had seen progress with his training. I had been improving so much that I could do anything the teachers told me to almost flawless. Misaki, Ryuu and Yushiro had been keeping up for a while but they didn't have at teacher like Kaito who were dedicating his last year at the school to help me. Well... He had been dedicating his life to become the best mentor of all time. Now he was just enjoying himself.

"I'm trying." I said and let all thoughts go away but I knew that in the back of my head questions about what kind of danger Konno-sensei and the Captain were facing right now. I knew that I wasn't as good as them but.. I were on my way. If I could get better faster and stronger then this.. I would be out together with them in no time.

Kaito looked up from his book. I hadn't heard what he had said. He stood up from the floor.

"I'm trying my best." I corrected myself. I took a deep breath. I think I sounded more irritated then I really was. Kaito frowned and walked towards me. Okay, I was a bit irritated not at him. I was angry at myself for being everything I fought not to be. Rude, arrogant, selfish... For the last months I had been counting on having him by my side. Now... I remembered who I had been. All I had needed was time to slow down and don't think about anything at all... even thought that meant more thinking about everything I should had been thinking about instead of training. He stopped right in front of me and studied my facial impression.

"You don't understand why you doing this so you don't come to the conclusion you are supposed to get to. You look like you're trying to understand your own thoughts and now is the time to not have any thoughts at all." Not have any thoughts at all? How were I suppose to do that? I held my breath.

" _Focus_ ," The voice inside of me said... just like this time it saved me again. " _Try to calm down and it will stop_."

The voice hadn't spoken to me in months. Calm down. It was words that I hadn't heard in months either. I were all trying to get everything and not miss a single detail that I was missing everything. I cried. Who would I had been without this voice? I had noticed everything but the voice were the last thing I needed to let everything effect me. Tears were flowing down my eyes. I was exhausted, tierd... I was... I was such a disappointment to myself. I had said that I was ready when I was not.

"I just... I." I didn't know what to say. "I just remembered why I have been doing all this." He looked a bit surprised, all he needed to do was talk to me and then.. then I did what this lesson was all about. It was all about taking a break and stop feeling pressure. Even thought I had forgotten about the reasons I trained I had still trained like a fool. My body where hurting and I didn't realize but I had been shaking all this time.

"I figured out that you needed some time to think. I don't want to lie... you have been all in you head lately. But I understand that. You're ready now." My tears stopped falling down my cheeks and I was staring at him. I was... Ready? Ready for what? He continued. "Only geniuses are able to jump over a year or more. It didn't take long for me to hear from Abarai-fukutaichou that Kuchiki-taichou and Konno Daisuke where out on a mission to get more knowledge about your brother." He.. knew? Did Sengún Mhil Kaito know all this time what my motive was? I opened my mouth to say something but nothing felt worth enough. "You want to become strong enough to help them out without being in the way... or am I wrong?" He was right. Kaito knew me all to well. The first tim we met I felt like he was looking right at my soul. Now, when we had shared company for months he knew every angle of it. He had seen it all and he had put the puzzle together. I nodded.

"But... how can I be ready?"

Kaito smiled at me. "You understood that you were taking this to a level that you wouldn't be capable to handle it in. In the same time, when you were letting go of the expectations and let yourself cry, you showed yourself capable to accept that fact. In other words. I don't think you will need to use your Shikai or your Bankai to this mission. You only need to know the basic but most of all: You have to know yourself. That's all you need and now when you got the life you want here you can go back and get knowlegde of the past."

"Do you know how I can find Konno-sensei and the Captain?" Kaito took up his hand and made the tears on my cheek go away with the arm of his white and blue shinigami clothes.

"You won't go yourself, you know. I have asked the Commander if it was okay for me and Abarai Renji to take you and your friends out of the school for a short while. The Commander sounded like he wanted to have Kuchiki-taichou back on duty and as the mission would make me, the new 3th seat of Squad 6, meet him in person. He accepted it. We will leave in two days."


	19. Chapter 19

_**Chapter 19**_

I had never thought that I would be ready to get out of this place and... inside me I knew that I still wasn't. Something inside me said to me that Kaito also knew that I wasn't ready but by the time I was ready - this opportunity would have gone far, far away. Yes, I thought that Kaito knew something more then he said. Well... he hadn't said anything about this adventure really. He had only mentioned when we were going and who was coming with us. I had however read that the Soul Society used butterflies to carry messages to know where the other Soul Reapers where. My guess was that he had send something to Konno-sensei and the Captain telling them to stay where they were to get back up. Okay, back up were probably the wrong word to use to this situation. We were more like the last chance for me to get in touch with Kei... if he lived.

I sighed and smiled to myself. The Captain... it had been so long time since I saw him. I wondered what he thought about Kei or what he had for believes what could had happened to him. I wondered what he thought about... me... if he even had any thought about me. I shook my head. I had to think about what was important. This mission was everything to me. If I didn't get anything new about Kei then I wouldn't know what to do. Would I still work out the way I did right now? Would I still want to get better... when I no longer had anything to fight for? This would determined who I was going to be in the future.

What would my friends say about this? Would they even like to come with me on this? They would lose more then me. They wouldn't gain anything. They would lose time at the academy and if we were meting hollows then they also could lose their lives. How could I even ask them to join me? I had to be a terrible person to even think that they would sacrifice that for a stupid wish to have my brother alive.

It wasn't only that anymore. It was that dream to. What had my mother meant by everything she thought? The only person that was – maybe – alive and there was Kei. He could maybe tell me what my mother meant by everything. Konno-sensei had said that the person who was after my brother was also after me but... why? Could my dream and Kei's disappearance have a connection? I almost begged for another dream but in the same time... the dream gave me creeps.

I walked along the path marked out outside the Academy. It was a warm day and everyone was having lunch in the sun. There they were. Misaki, Ryuu and Yūshirō were sitting together talking to each other in all happy voices. I could almost hear Ryuu's voice inside my head as he spoke. 'What? Are we leaving the Academy because your mentor thinks you will not get killed searching for your brother? If you ask me, if your brother wanted to met you – if he's not dead – he would have come for you." I could at the same time almost see Misaki stare at him after that and encouraging me with a line like: 'Oh, Ayame, don't listen to him. There are probably really good reasons why Kei is where he is. What do we know? Maybe my father and the Captain already found out everything and we would just go there, visiting them and then go back.' I hadn't had the time to really get to know Yūshirō but by the was they were talking right now – he was a part of the group.

I hadn't joined them for lunch for weeks but when I came towards them, they didn't look at me as I didn't belong. They waved at me and made a place for me as one of them. I felt something warm inside me. I had thought all this time that I was alone but... I wasn't. I had always had them by my side and they wanted to be there. They were like stars. They were always there even if you didn't see them all the time. I sat down and Misaki gave me one of her rice balls. I hadn't even thought about going to fetch my own food, all in my head thinking about what and how I would bring them these news and of course thinking about everything as usual.

"Already done training? You're not used to quit this early are you? Is it so boring to have time to kill?" Ryuu laughed and hit me soft on my shoulder. His whit hair had become much longer then I had noticed before. He put his hair behind his ears to not get all the hair in the way of his green eyes. I laughed a bit and shook my head.

"Not really... Kaito said that I'm ready." Misaki gasped and Yūshirō looked like he didn't know how to react. Ryuu were however still laughing but then his voice died slowly out. We sat all there together on the grass in complete silent.

"Kaito thinks that you're ready to leave the academy? Is he stupid or something? You don't even have a Shika and... what about your brothers murderer or.. the one that made a move to get him killed at least?! If you go outside the walls that person will make his or her move." Yūshirō took tone after that.

"Ryuu is right. You can't go out there alone! Who knows what will happen..."

"I know but Kaito and Abarai-fukutaichou will be with me so it shouldn't really be a problem. The Commander gave them everything we need for the journey because he want the Captain to come back to duty. This is the only way for everyone to get what they want."

"I hope you're going to invite us to go with you." Misaki took my hand. Her small fingers were warm in mine and I felt a pain like I was being stabbed. Stabbed by myself.  
"I... can't do that. If something were to happ.." They looked at me like I was stupid and that made me not finish my sentence. Misaki continued speaking. "Ever since you told us about your dream and about your brother – you have fought like an animal all alone. We feel bound to help you now when we didn't help you at all this last months. We are your friends. We would go anywhere to find out what happened to your brother. I couldn't live with myself knowing that you went through all of this and in the end, when you needed us, we weren't there. Am I right or not? Yūshirō and Ryuu were nodding to agree with her.

"You said before that you were destined for something great, right? If this is true then we have to protect you so that you can achieve that.. only if it's a good destiny of course. On top of that... didn't my father say to you to stay away from Squad 6 and now you're just walking together out with them?! If your vision was right, Ayame, then we have to come with you." I had almost forgot about that warning. Yes, this mission made me go to eveything I before almost swore to stay away from. I would go outside the walls. I would be in the paws on Squad 6. This destined thing still ached a bit in my skinn. How could I be born into something that I didn't even know? My mother had said in my dream that they weren't suppose to keep me. Was that the reason I was destined? Then.. if I weren't brought to those that would watch me grow up then wouldn't this destiny passed away to someone else? It couldn't be bound to just me. Yūshirōs dark eyes looked at me and started to talk after Misaki. He was always such a smart kid saying all those things that made you realize what was the best thing to do..

"This is the one and only shot you have had to get an answer to the dream and to the mystery behind Kei's disappearance. If you didn't do this you would regret it. That is the kind of person I have seen you be."

"So.. you're all up to leave the Spiritual Arts Academy for a short while to get all answers?"  
"Of course," said everyone after each other. "Let's get to the bottom to all of this!"


	20. Chapter 20

_**Chapter 20**_

" _Kei!" My name was the first words she said. I still remembered that moment, she had just awoken from a long sleep and called my name to make me pick her up from the little box she slept in. She wasn't that young anymore. Her blond hair had become long and her eyes was the must beautiful thing I had ever seen. I understood why she was selected. I understood why she was the one they wanted... but not yet. No... never. I would never give her up. She was my sister. She wouldn't fit in their cage._

 _She was all grown up nor... or... she was becoming a teenager. She would never be all grown up in my eyes. She sat on the stone stairs, looking at the street – searching for something. I first didn't think she searched for me but then.. then she said my name the same way she first did. She jumped up on her feet and ran towards me. She gave me a great hug and wanted to know everything that had happened at the Spiritual Arts Academy. I had just finished my third year but my studies where still going strong now when Kuchiki Byakuya had been promoted to Captain. The day when he became Captain he came directly to me saying that he was able to teach me. He said he had promised his father to do so and now was the time. We had been talking to each other before, of course, his father said that out friendship was the last thing my mother wished. I knew that Ayame would be falling for him as soon as she saw him. That was why I decided not to let her met him... not yet. Today were the first day Byakuya and I would practice but before that I had to see my Ayame. What kind of brother would I had been if I never came back home when she waited?_

 _I lift her up in my arms and started to spin around. She was my world. My everything. She was my motivation and the reason I lived. She laughed and after a while I put her down. I hated to say to her that I had to go back.. but she said it was okay. I knew that she wasn't okay with it but she knew that I never wanted to leave her alone. She knew in her heart that I would never leave her if I didn't had to. She walked back to the stairs to watch over all the people on the street. I didn't think she understood why she did that but I did. When she said that she hadn't done anything a whole day she had done more things that anyone did in a week. She watched over everyone and if they were miserable in any way she went forward and made their day. She was the prue goodness. I walked back to the Academy along the street full with people but then.. then something happened. In an alley something came walking towards me. The alley was dark even if the sun hadn't been going down quite yet. I didn't see the face of the man standing there but I heard it's on the voice._

" _I was surprised when she wasn't delivered to me, Tamako Kei." She.. wasn't delivered to.. him? I turned around and took a grip on my wooden katana that I had in my belt. I pointed it at the shadow in the alley. This could only be... the one my mother was talking about before she died. I started to walk into the alley without hesitation. I hated this person with all my heart. I would destroy him. I would make him pay for taking my mothers life because... if this person had the ability to make my sister destined for something then this person also could have saved my mothers life._

" _I'm here to take her now, Tamako Kei. You can't do anything now. I forgive you for your selfishness to keep her but.. as your mother said. She's not yours to keep. You maybe failed to deliver her to me when she was born but she wasn't really necessary then. And now when I have watched over her all these years it maybe was good to let her live in this world for a while. She have become everything she's suppose to be. The thing that changed it that she's growing more and more important. It's better to take her in now so she can fulfill her duty without any mistakes." I froze. He.. he wanted to have her right now? She.. she was only a child. She hadn't even dreamed about her own future yet, dreamed about what she wanted to become. It was that I wanted to give to her._

 _"No matter who you are... my answer will be the same all the time. No. She's not going anywhere. I don't care if she was yours... she is mine now. She was born to be my sister and nothing else. We share the same blood and you... what do you share with her? Some stupid rumor you probably invented yourself." I couldn't be anything other then brave. I had to be brave. I had to have something to say against him. I stopped. The alley were to dark to see anything inside. It was weird considering that it wasn't that dark outside on the street. He made it. He had to made this nightfall come sooner then expected. He didn't want me to see him._

 _"You're brave, Tamako Kei. I give you that... but you will never get enough power to defeat me. If you turn your back on me then everyone will turn their back on you. If you make me your enemy then I suggest you should leave the Spiritual Art Academy. Everyone within the Gotei 13 are under my domain." Everyone in the Gotei 13 Squads was under his domain? What was that for claim? Was that even possible..? Then I knew. I knew this person. How could I been so blind? Only one person could be saying all of this and I knew in that same moment that I would never have a chance giving Ayame her own future if I were in the same form as him. I would never be in the same form as him but as long as Ayame was watching then he would stay in this form._

" _Do you test me? Come at me! Strike me down! I dare you, You will never get her before you get through me. You won't be able to lay your hands on her."  
"The only reason why I haven't laid my hands on her is because of your stupid enchantment you have around your neck. I can break it but... that will make terrible things happen so I let that be for now. I don't want to kill you. If I did that she would be seeing me as the bad guy. I can't do that. She has to stay true to everything and everyone. That's why I have to take her away from here. Everyone here is spitting at her greatness. She belong with me. Only I can make her truly happy."_

" _You are the bad guy. As soon as Ayame sees you she will understand that she has to keep her distance. Even if I wasn't there by her side while that was happening she would still always chose me. No matter what condition I was in." For the first time, that voice laughed like never before. Like he found all of this funny._

" _The chrystal stones... it's funny how such a simple thing can stop me but as soon as you take it then I can put my plan... Wait... you gave me a wonderful idea, Tamako Kei. I have gotten an even better idea then before. Thank you, now have you made everything easier." I didn't like the sound of that at all. I opened my mouth to talk back to him but another voice came to me. I turned around and on the street stood no one other then the Captain himself in a new robe and everything. It suited him more then I thought it would. Ayame would had loved looking at this man. Maybe it was wrong of me not letting them know each other. Sure, Ayame was a child but age wasn't really a problem in a city were everyone had died once in the human world. Byakuya Kuchiki looked as irritated as always but that was just something he put up with to scare people away._

" _What's happening here, Kei?" What was really happening? That was the question I really wanted an answer for myself. Instead I had to figure out everything piece by piece.  
"Do you remember what your father told you about me?" It came just out of me. Byakuya looked surprised at my question.  
"He said that you had something to fight greater then anything... something that we don't se as the enemy." That sounded easier then it was. I put my wooden katana back in the belt._

" _I have to become great, Byakuya. Greater then any Death God before and time is running short."_


	21. Chapter 21

_**Chapter 21**_

I stared down in my breakfast as I sat on by the table at the girl dormitory. My heart was racing like never before. I.. I saw myself this time. I saw everything out of Kei's point of view. I had never knew that he loved me that much. My heart was pounding in my ears so loud that I didn't hear what Misaki told me about the lessons we would have today. The last lessons we would have before going out to find the answers to this mystery. It couldn't be any later. I had to know.

Kei cared so much about me that the only thing he ever thought about was me.. and for the first time I understood. Someone was only after me. Kei had been the person that had crossed the fire and fought my battle. This person that had talked to Kei was the one that was after me. I had never heard his voice before. I looked at the side of my plate and took up the necklace from the table. What did this piece have in all this? The person said that when the time came and Kei took it of he would be able to hurt us both. What I still didn't understand was why Kei and I was marked as some kind of enemy? Why us? The only one I could ask about this was Kaito, he who had the same necklace as me. If these necklaces were some kind of protection then I now understood why Kaito wanted me to wear his necklace while I didn't had my own on. We both were haunted by this monster. That had to be why Kaito wanted to be a part of this mission. That was the reason why he had taken an inserts in me at the entering ceremony and said that he wanted to become my mentor. He wanted to get an end to this monster and we were the only two who could do it. To put all this to an conclusion: The only reason why I now needed to see Kei, alive or not – he had to have left behind something - was to know all the detail to what we fought against. Everything else now came as a bonus.

I had also seen the rather young version of my hero, the Captain of squad 6 – Byakuya Kuchiki. I didn't know that they had been childhood friends, Kei and the Captain. That made more sense why the Captain had attended the funeral. My thought stopped. Maybe the Captain knew something? Maybe Konno-sensei also knew something more but decided not to tell me before he left so that I could focus on the Academy? That was laughable now... their plan didn't work at all as I were ore determined to become powerful.

The question that stood now was... should I tell my friends about this dream? It wasn't really leads in this dream and wouldn't give then anything other then worries. They knew what waited for them.. it was only I who needed to understand more what we stood against. Misaki and I left breakfast together and met up with Ryuu and Yūshirō. We went to our first lesson and as always went Misaki to her class. I still couldn't understand why she hadn't been granted to come to the first class. Normally would I had already been training for a few hours but I thought that Kaito would have wanted me to have rested enough. Tomorrow was the day.

"Why are a lieutenant on our lesson?" I thought Ryuu was joking but he wasn't. In the corner of the classroom sat Abarai Renju, the lieutenant of Squad 6. I hadn't seen him sense the entrance ceremony. His head was red as ever and he sat like he was about to die of boredom. Why was he here? Then.. I knew. He was here to see us and understand what kind of newbies we were.

"He maybe prays that we're not useless." said Ryuu as he took the lead. We sat down for the first time ever on the first row of the class. Ryuu probably thought that we had to show him that we were dedicated and in the same time didn't want to sit right next to him.

"We're not useless." said Yūshirō and looked at me as he patted his hair down. He always had that crazy hairstyle when he woke up- He still hadn't fixed it. "Tell him that we're not useless. If someone were to survive outside and go on a mission we would be the ones." I looked at Ryuu and nodded.

"Yūshirō speaks the truth. I don't think they would let all of us go if it wasn't safe. They could just agreed to let me go but they said that you were invited too. I think that this will be a perfect moment to learn something new. We will not get hurt. We're the top, right?" I lied. I had to keep up this wall between them and the truth. I thought it was safe for them but... for me? I was prepared to met my death. They had however a time to learn something... like how it was to met your destiny and fail to defeat the enemy you always have had.

"Say's the girl that ranked the highest on the entrance exam and the mid-term exam. I heard the teachers discuss our process with our souls blade. They all said that you already had yours." They.. had said what? I laughed and shook my head.

"I would have know if I had a dream that someone wanted me to call its name or had heard whispers in my ears. I haven't heard anything so that must just be a bad guess." Neither Ryuu or Yūshirō was sure about this.

"Maybe you have heard it but you thought it was something else." I fell silent. This was out of my comfort zone. Yushiro was one of the smartest person I had met. If he had a theory then I wanted to hear it.  
"Like.. like what?"

"I don't know. I haven't heard it but when I do then I'm going to tell you what you should look for. Something however tells me by the time I have get in touch with my Shika then you already have a Bankai. You think so low about yourself. Kaito wouldn't spend all that time with you if he didn't think you were a genius and could jump over a few years." I was just about to answer that but what were I supposed to say? That Kaito probably only was there with me because we shared the same enemy? I thanked the Soul King for making our teacher, Gengorō Ōnabara, come into the classroom. In his hands he held dozens of swords. This... this was... the Sword ceremony. I had only heard stories about it. This wasn't really a big thing but for students that longed for their katana? This was something big. These swords were more shells then a Zanpakutō. A Zanpakutō did you create... but this was the tool you needed to comunicate with you Zanpakutō and make it come out in a sword form.

"Today you're lucky. The Commander has chosen this class to become the first class to get their own katana months before they are used to. These blades.." He put them down on the teachers table. Every sword looked like each other but that was the thing. When we found the one that spoke to us most then as we took it, it would transform after our reiatsu and then found its own spiritual pressure.

"Are those you will chose between. You don't have to worry, if a sword doesn't speak to you then you don't chose one. It will only mean that you haven't created a bound strong enough. We will try again for you to find your true match later. If you asked me, to do this months to early is absurd. Almost no one have created a bound this early.. oh.. Abarai-fukutaichou. What a suprise!" Everyone had noticed that Abarai Renji was sitting in the back of the class. He walked towards all the swords and took up one of them looking at them like he was judging them. Then, he put it down and looked over the class.

"Hey, punks. My name's Abarai Renji and I'm the lieutanent of squad 6. I'm here to see that you don't start to stab each other. If you were to do so you will be pleased to hear that you will be kicked out of the program. That's the only thing I'm here to say." That was an encouraging speach.. or not. I saw that Gengorō Ōnabara looked at him with a proud look. Yes, he had been his student alright.

We all were allowed to stand up and join in one long row before the swords. We all were looking at the swords and everyone as clueless as the other about what we were suppose to feel. If we felt anything towards one of the swords we were allowed to take it up and feel it's weight. However... there wasn't anyone who stepped forward. I looked at the swords. What where I looking for? I sighed and searched and there... there it was. There was one I held my eyes on. I didn't know if it was the sword speaking to me or if it was just that I thought it was the most beautiful sword. Okay, all the katana looked much like each other but this sword was a little bit different.

It was the handle really, that made me get stuck by it. A bright yellow silk ribbon were wrapping the handle and at the end of the katana were a chain haning down with some pearls looking like flowers and at the very end was the same thing that was on the Captain of Squad 6's robe – a tassel. I stepped forward and took it up. As soon I touched it the katana started to glow. I looked up but no one else then me was seeing it.

" _Finally,_ " said the Zanpakutō. " _Finally have you learn how to truly focus._ _"_


	22. Chapter 22

_**Chapter 22**_

That voice. Was that... was that my Zanpakutō? Had that been my Zanpakutō all this time? But... wasn't it the voice of the Captain? It was weird having some voice inside your head even if you, as a Death God, wanted to hear it. I, however, felt at ease when I heard his voice. It felt like I could see everything clearer. For me... it felt like a gift. This was also a gift, hearing the Zanpakutō but... I wanted it to be him so bad. To always have him by my side but.. it wasn't him. It probably never had been him either. It made sense that the teachers had said that I had have it all the time now... but... I really really wanted it to be something else.

" _Sorry to disappoint you, Tamako Ayame."_ It spoke to me again but now in a different voice. It was a womens voice, probably it's true voice. A sweet voice that sounded calm, like it was an angel that spoke to me. I sighed but couldn't help but smile. It wasn't my Zanpakutōs fault. It was my own. I just wanted to have ties to something that I didn't have a connection to at all. _"It's okay."_ I thought back to it. The sword didn't answer back at first. I just stood there waiting for it to talk back to me as if just because it had started to say a few more words than usual it would speak freely to me. I wasn't disappointed.

" _I took the voice of the only person you would listen to."_

I held the katana in my hand and smiled to myself. This was the one. This was my souls blade because only I could know such a personal thing. I looked up and saw that both Ryuu and Yūshirō had taken one of the swords. Ryuu held in a rather long katana, probably the longest of them before us. The handle were formed in a rather bend angle and instead of having a ribbon enveloped around the handle it was small patterns engraved on it. I couldn't see from this distance what it was. Yūshirō on the other hand had one of the smallest katanas in his hand. The ribbon on the handle were in two colors, yellow and purple. They looked up and we changed looks for a short while. Then we laughed quietly to each other. This felt like a miracle... but it probably wasn't. There wouldn't be a chance that we got them the day before we were leaving. It couldn't be a chance that we wouldn't find our sword because... we probably would need it on this adventure.

No one else in the class happened to get their sword yet. They hadn't fought like animals like I, Ryuu and Yushiro had. Abarai-fukutaichou sighed and turned to the door. Everyone looked at him and held their breaths. Yes, he were kind of scary with all those tattoos.

"Those who found their match, follow me." We all three looked at each other and followed him outside. It was a beautiful day. The sun where shining and.. I looked down at my neck. I had forgot putting the necklace on! I stared at the ground. I had to have that necklace on. Especially after that dream. Where could I have put it? I had it this morning and... Misaki probably had it. Yes. I had to go to her after this. I had always had it on after Kaito wanted me to borrow his. This was the first time I really had taken it off. Now and during the night of course. We walked to one of the training rooms and when we came in we walked to the middle of the room and sat down.

"So, you punks are the ones that will follow me and the new 3th seat of Squad 6, Según Mhil Kaito." Ryuu looked directly to me. Oh, I hadn't said to them that Kaito had been given a position inside Squad 6. The truth was that he would only get that position if the Captain of Squad 6 accepted him. That was probably another reason why Kaito wanted to go on this mission. To be given the special seat. It would be surprising if the Captain said no.

The Captain... my heart skipped a beat. I would soon met him. Really met him, after all this time. I could also met Kei but... was it wrong of me to want to met the Captain more? I had believed so bad that Kei was dead. It felt more logical to met someone I knew was alive.

"It wasn't surprising really that it was only you three. Considering your background and families." Background and families? Wait. Did the lieutenant knew everything about us? The way he said it made me believe that. I froze. Yushiro had told us that his sister where once the Captain of Squad 2 so it was obvious that he found his. Kei were a natural and considering that he knew Abarai-fukutaichou, the lieutanent knew my background and family. Who he didn't know about was Ryuu. No one knew that story, not even himself. He had been living working in an restaurant and had no one really. I gave Ryuu a confused look. He looked as gone he.

"What... are you talking about?" asked Ryuu.. For the first time in my life I heard him being unsure. Ryuu was always the one telling what he thought in a very strong way. He was out of his safe zone but who wouldn't? He had grown up on the street really and then taken in by a nice man that made him work in the restaurant he owned. When the restaurant shut down was when he met Konno-sensei and Misaki. If Abarai-fukutaichou talked about family then... then it meant that he knew who Ryuu was related to. That meant he knew the reasons why Ryuu had grown up the way he did.

"You... don't know? Oh, you're so stupid. Even your name screams it." What did that mean? Ryuu Shiro didn't scream anything... or did it? I had never thought about it before and neither had Ryuu. Ryuu meant "dragon" and shiro meant "four" and "son". Ryuu wasn't really the fourth son.. or was he? Could it be something more about his name then just the meaning behind it?  
"I'm not really the person you should speak to about this. I wasn't suppose to say anything about it. Talk to the Captain of Squad 10 and you will know. Well then. I want to talk to you about the plan and by no circumstances will you disobey this rules."

The rules were simple really. We weren't allowed to attack at all, only to defend ourself. We weren't allowed to go somewhere else then what they said to us. It was more rules, of course, but they were so obvious that it wasn't even worth remembering. It was something that was stuck in the back... because I would never run out in the middle of the night trying to slay a hollow. I didn't want to die yet. Abarai-fukutaichou also said that to unlock our Shikai we had to get the name of our Zanpakutōs. He said that would take years to master and that some didn't even get their names... one reason could be that the bound between the sword and the Death God wasn't strong enough and that the Zanpakutō didn't have a name. Some wasn't meant to have that sort of power. I almost hear my sword laughing for itself. _"No problem,"_ had it said. _"When you need to know my name, I'm going to tell you."_ I saw that Ryuu's thought was on a different planet. When the meeting ended I grabbed his arm.

"Aren't you going to speak to the Captain of Squad 10?" I knew that that was the thing he thought about. He could talk to someone and get all the answers he had been wanting all his life. They answers where here too. He only needed to walk to the Squad 10 barrack and ask for the Captain.

"I will do it when I come back from the mission of ours. If I have lived this long not knowing then it won't matter if I find out later." I frowned.

"Of course it matters. What if you don't come back from this mission? Then you would never know what happened... what was the rea.." He interrupted me.

"Do you remember a few months ago? When I said that I also wanted to know what happened to my family? That I was jealous? To tell the truth... I don't think I want to know. That family left me... whatever the reason maybe. Kei didn't leave you. He was with you all the time and probably was forced to leave you. No one got forced to leave me. I could almost promise you that."


End file.
